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Yes, We Need a Little Christmas

Dear sister,

Having moved to a new town I have been in the process of seeking out a new home church. Every Sunday I have been to a different church and the sermon I heard at this Sunday’s church was on how Christmas is about productivity. Now you’re probably raising your eyebrows, but I urge you, dear sister, to keep reading.

During the hectic holiday season it is easy to get lost in family dinners, Christmas decorations, and checking off everyone’s Christmas lists. But this is not the kind of productivity the pastor was getting at. He furthered explained that Christmas is about the productivity that was established in the very beginning.

In Genesis 1:28 God commands Adam and Eve to “be fruitful and multiply.” This verse is not simply referring to reproduction but to the very kind of life the Lord purposed his creation to live. He created us in order to accomplish the work he had prepared for us. He created us to be productive. But what happened? As you’ll remember, Adam and Eve rebelled against God, plunging all of humanity into the deep darkness of sin.

As a result, we now struggle to live productive lives. We struggle to accomplish the things that, before sin, would have been completely natural to do. It is this barrenness that brought Jesus into the world. He came to restore us to the kind of fruitful and productive life that God created us to live.

One of my favorite parts of Christmas is singing Christmas songs but much of today’s popular Christmas music has nothing to do with Jesus or the reason for Christmas at all. “Silver Bells” (now on my list of hated Christmas songs) speaks of Christmas being “Santa’s big scene” and “We Need a Little Christmas” demands tinsel on evergreen boughs, fruitcake, and stockings so that we can feel like it’s Christmas time.

But none of these things give us what we need. Santa isn’t the star of the show. We are in desperate need of restoration so that we can live lives of productivity for Christ as God purposed for us before He even laid the foundation of the world. This is what Jesus brings. This is why we celebrate Christmas—not because Santa Claus is coming to town.

So, yes, we do need Christmas. Without it we remain dead and barren. Christ accomplished what we could not. He did what the Lord had assigned to him and he did it perfectly. Praise be to the Lord that He did too. For there is no other name in which we find life, no other name by which we are saved and no other name by which we can be called sons of God.

Merry Christmas!

Your sister,

Kayla

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Slaves No Longer

“I mean that the heir, as long as he is a child, is no different from a slave, though he is the owner of everything, but he is under guardians and managers until the date set by his father. In the same way we also, when we were children, were enslaved to the elementary principles of the world. But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!” So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God.” Galatians 4:1-7

My dear sisters,
Paul is reminding the believers in the church of Galatia what they have in Christ. They were reverting back to the law to save them from their sins rather than to trust in Christ for the salvation of their sins. He tells them that the law enslaved them to the ways of the world but there was a much better way to be a son of inheritance…by the birth of a tiny baby in Bethlehem.

This child lived a perfect life honoring his earthly parents and his Heavenly Father. He fulfilled the law of the Jewish nation satisfying the Creators commandments perfectly. Then he was crucified and killed taking the penalty of sin that the law required. The final act was rising again on the third day conquering sin and death. The curtain of the temple was torn in two symbolizing access to the heavenly thrown with no more sacrifice! Both Jews and Gentiles now get God freely by faith in their Messiah…no works required.

Those who put their faith in Jesus, no matter what nationality, have been grafted into the family of God through Christ! He has adopted us as sons! That means we have access to the chosen family with all the inheritance and blessings of a son. We can’t earn this right, God has given it to us freely by faith alone in Christ alone! Wow. Slowly, the realization of the power and amazement of this passage is becoming sweeter to me.

Why has this become sweeter to me lately? We are months away from grafting two more children into the Craig family through adoption. It has taken heartbreak, tears, and years to reach this point. We have fought hard with paperwork, agencies, and even countries. When these two chosen children become Craigs, they will never be orphans again. They will receive all of our inheritance and rights as Craigs. They have been chosen not because of what they have done, but out of our love for them. How exciting! It has made me realize that I was an orphan once, living in poverty and the stench of my own sin, when my Father chose to make me His child, His son (yes, son!) with all the blessings and inheritance that comes from His heavenly home. Not for what I have done, but because of His love for me. So dear sister, rejoice this Christmas! Bask in the glory of Sonship! You have been chosen! Not for what you do or earn, but because of what Christ has finished! You are no longer a slave to the world, you are a son! By His spirit you can cry “ABBA, FATHER!” What a gift! You can come confidently before the throne of God because of your given Sonship. Run to Him this Christmas. Run to your daddy and thank Him for His unconditional love.

Your Sister in Christ,
Colleen

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The ‘Gift of Going Second’

Dearest sister,

My husband and I have started a fun little dinnertime ritual, which involves a deck of conversation cards. A few days ago, the dinnertime question was, “What qualities are most important for you when choosing a friend?” We both enjoy having interesting conversations, and agreed that was a nice quality in a friendship, as are sacrifice, loyalty, and generosity. However, having a genuine, authentic friend who is willing to share her heart and struggles is far more important to me than any other trait.

Have you experienced this type of relational intimacy? If so, then you will most likely agree that this is a rare gift in this busy world. We are happy to connect with friends on more light-hearted topics, even if we cannot share our hearts. There is certainly nothing wrong with these types of friendships- not all relationships can or should be ones in which we bare our souls. Though this desire may be buried in your heart, we are created with a need and longing for depth of relationship. We are made in the image of our Creator.
Why do we often not experience this lack of intimacy in friendships? One obvious answer is the busy, frenetic pace at which life passes. Sin clouds our relationships as well, keeping us from feeling safe among ‘friends’. We certainly need to deal with both of those issues head on. But I’d like to suggest another reason we don’t have these friendships.

Are we willing to share our hearts? Opening up our hearts to another sinner is
s-c-a-r-y at times. Okay, who am I kidding? It is very rarely easy to open up about who we are, our weaknesses, our fears, the things that lie beneath the surface of who we appear to be outwardly. It is even scary to share our dreams and desires with friends. What if they think I’m crazy? I’ve certainly felt that way before.

But as controversial author Anne Jackson (now Miller) writes about, we need to give each other the ‘gift of going second’. In other words, are we willing to open up our hearts to a friend, giving them the courage to also share honestly, or do we always wait for others to take the risk first?

Beautiful, honest, deep, meaningful relationships are born out of the risk to be open and vulnerable. I’ve seen it happen so many times in my life. This certainly has not always been because of courage on my part, but because I was desperately in need or facing tremendous trials. But those seasons have always brought the closest bonds, bonds that continue to this day.

The enemy of our souls wants nothing more than to divide us, so we must fight for honest relationships. Honesty brings unity, and this is pleasing to God (Psalm 133:1-3). If you knew how much a sister was struggling, would you gossip about her, or tear her down in your thoughts, or judge her inwardly? No, you would most likely reach out to her in love. Likewise, we can more deeply experience God’s love when we open ourselves up to those around us, allowing them to meet our needs and support us as we struggle. We must also be willing to forgive and let go of bitterness in order for honest conversation to happen.

In this busy holiday season, it might seem impossible to foster these types of conversations, but I assure you, there is a sister out there who desperately needs to know she’s not the only one struggling. Perhaps you need that support as well. Reaching IN to our communities is just as important as reaching OUT. Pray about a sister to pursue, and then listen, share your struggles, your dreams and joys as well! There are certainly no guarantees, but don’t be surprised if your relationships start to change for the better.

Your sister,
Ruth

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Sitting in the Dirt

Dear Sisters,

I looked up the word “friend,” as used in Proverbs 17:17 (“A friend loves at all times”), in a Hebrew dictionary. The word means ‘an associate (more or less close)’ and comes from the root, ‘to tend a flock’ or to ‘pasture it’ –by extension, ‘to associate with (as a friend).’ Working on tasks and eating together are the glue of many of my friendships. Likewise, many times we suffer through adversity together in these moments, which create and cement longstanding bonds.

My thoughts turned toward the story of Job and his friends. Job’s friends traveled to meet with him after hearing of the misfortunes that had swept over him. “When they lifted up their eyes at a distance and did not recognize him, they raised their voices and wept. And each of them tore his robe and they threw dust over their heads toward the sky. Then they sat down on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights with no one speaking a word to him, for they saw that his pain was very great.” Job 2:12-13.
Amazing love these men showed their friend! I love my friends and want to meet them in their pain, to help if I can; but I have never sat in the dirt with anyone for over an hour, much less days and nights—without speaking. (Note: they were men, however.) Unfortunately, after their great show of love, they turn from sorrowing with their friend to accusing him in their own self-righteousness.

I am afraid I too often make the same prideful mistake when a friend meets trouble. I want to help, so I seek out all the ways they have failed—to help them fix their problems and move on, of course. Yet, “a friend loves at ALL times”—the verse does not continue with said friend fixing imperfections—just loving. Sitting in the dirt. My friendships should be powdered with more of the dust of trials, and less of my desired white wash.

In James 2:23, the author recalls Abraham and God’s friendship, “’And Abraham believed God, and it was reckoned to him as righteousness,’ and he was called the friend of God.” What an incredible testimony. Abraham believed—he accepted God’s promise that he would have infinite descendants even in the midst of his childless sorrow! He and God sat in the dirt together, trusted, and were friends.

Dear God, please cultivate these friendship qualities in my life—yes, dirt and all.

Running(and sometimes sitting)with you,
Rebecca

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A Good Friend

Dear sister,

I always thought I knew what friendship was until I was asked to write about it. Hmmm…I know that friendship on the east coast is hard at first but lasts forever while friendship on the west coast is instant yet can be fleeting…or so stereotypes tell. I do know a bad friendship when I see one. Yet when I try to define it I come up lacking. As a Navy wife living overseas and knowing a friendship may last for only a year or three, it makes me question even more what real friendship is. So what is friendship?
Funny enough, I found myself singing a song that my two year old listens to…forgive me for quoting song lyrics in the midst of this conversation…BUT, here is what Sovereign Grace Music is teaching my daughter…and me:

A friend will always think of others
A friend will overlook a wrong
A friend sticks closer than a brother
A friend is patient all along
Jesus, let me be the friend You are to me

CHORUS
A good friend, true friend
Here to help you through friend
Strong friend, kind friend
You can have what’s mine, friend
Best friend, sure friend
Humble and a pure friend
Lord, I wanna be a good friend

A friend will help me do the right things
A friend won’t lead me into sin
A friend will help me when I stumble
A friend will lift me up again
Jesus, help me find a friend who’ll make me wise

Wow, are you as convicted as I am? A humble and a pure friend, a friend that won’t lead me into sin, a friend like Jesus. Jesus. I never put friendship into the realm of theology before this letter to you. Yet when I asked my husband how he would define friendship, the first thing he said was to be like Jesus. Jesus lovingly and humbly rebuked His friends when they were in sin or being tempted to sin. He was there in the tumultuous storms with them. He gave his life up for His friends. Would I do that for my friends? Even if I only know them for a year or three? That’s what He did. Jesus is a friend of sinners, why? Because they are the ones that need Him…we are sinners. We need Him. We need to trust Him. We need to give our lives to the only true example of a lasting and meaningful friendship. Jesus, may the friendships that I make here on earth model the one you gave to me freely when I was at my worst and was not a friend back.

Your sister,
Colleen