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Pride and The Torture Rack

Dear Sister,

I am a woman of strength and confidence. My parents did an amazing job raising my sister and me. They prepared and encouraged us. They praised our successes. One success led to another and another. They were a strong foundation for my life and adulthood. My confidence in who I was as their child, a woman, and a child of God was great. However, I have heard it said (Love & Respect marriage seminar) that “every strength has a back sided weakness”. Thinking through the devil’s tactics and knowing he likes to tailor his attacks to each individual (particularly by honing in on their weaknesses), I wondered what the weakness of this wonderful strength was.

I almost choked when I realized what it was.

Pride.

Just about every conflict I have found myself deeply wounded by was because someone pointed out an area that I thought I had handled, covered, or was competent in—and they felt otherwise. I’m not saying they were always right, but as soon as I heard something other than a positive, I got (get) defensive and hurt. The funny thing is I don’t tend to question whether I am still a strong woman, capable and able to get things done; but I mope around and tend to be consumed by the criticism for a time (often a loooong time).   If true, I should allow the criticism to shape me into a better individual; if untrue, I should toss it out. I have done neither. Instead I have allowed the devil and my own prideful heart to condemn me to a torture rack that I am on, but not tied to.

Yes, you read that right. Christ freed me at the cross yet I am the foolishly jump up on to that torture device and allow the devil to gleefully turn the screw. And he will, until you and I realize the game he’s playing and GET OFF!

I am jumping off and running away with this in mind and in action:

“Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interest, but also for the interest of others. Have this attitude in yourselves, which was also in Christ Jesus, who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.” Phil. 2:3-8

If that doesn’t keep my pride (and the devil) at bay, I am confident I can find another verse (or more) to attack my pride. Dear sister, please join me and run out of Satan’s torture chamber. He can’t hold us there unless we choose to stay. Christ saved us from more than just Hell. He saved us for an abundant life!

Running with you,

Rebecca

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The Nearness of Our Blessed Hope

My dear sister,

As I sit in the comfort of my home with my cup of coffee in hand, thinking of you and watching the news of the world, my heart wells up in gratitude to the Lord for our safety from violent persecutions simply because we profess to be Christ-followers. Certainly there have been times in my own life when my love for Jesus has caused discomfort in those who do not love Him, even scorn and disdain, but never to the point of physical harm or the State coming to take me away. I know that in our own USA there are those whose families have ostracized them, there are small businesses which have been shut down, there are lawsuits against organizations who refuse to compromise their core beliefs.  These are hurtful and serious situations, the outcome of many still unknown.  Our first amendment rights seem to be in jeopardy over various issues including homosexual ‘marriages’ abortion ‘rights’, and transgender ‘rights’. At present, none of these are resulting in torture and death to those in opposition, but they certainly are an oppression of serious noteworthiness…Which brings me back to the world news…

It is with horror that we hear of our brothers and sisters and children being beheaded, crucified, set on fire, or drowned. I do not mean to minimize in any way our own trials, diseases, disappointments, and deep losses of various kinds, but in our trials perspective is always beneficial.

I think of Hebrews 11 with its list of pilgrims and sufferers and martyrs. Though they had many promises of the coming of Christ, they never saw, here on earth, the fulfillment of those promises, yet “they all died in faith, not having received the promises, but having seen them afar off were assured of them, embraced them and confessed that they were strangers and pilgrims on the earth…Others were tortured, not accepting deliverance, that they might obtain a better resurrection…of whom the world was not worthy.”

I think of the apostles, all put to death except the exiled, beloved John. I think of the believers through the centuries who suffered simply because they loved the Lord Jesus and would not deny their love. “They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.” (Revelation 12:11)

There are Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego–refusing to obey the Kings edicts, knowing death must follow, unless God… And Luther’s brave stand before the Diet of Worms. Get a copy of Foxe’s “Book of Martyrs”, read with horror and awe, and think long and hard about the test of faithfulness.

Sweet sister, when we get bogged down by the things in our own lives, let us ask God to remind us of the big old world out there filled with so much evil and imposed suffering and unimaginable abuse and persecution in the name of false gods against those who love our Lord Jesus.
Many of our brothers and sisters are experiencing sheer terror at this moment. They are despairing of life itself yet they are clinging to God, our Father. My heart cries out to Him on their behalf.

Pray with me.

O, our God, our hearts ache and cry out to You for all those in this world who are being or will be persecuted simply because they are faithful to Jesus Christ. Please prepare all of your children for a day of possible persecution by strengthening us in our trust in You, Your Word, and in Your goodness now, so that no matter what, we would remain faithful to You, by Your grace. May we all have “persecution grace” and not shrink from living boldly for Christ in every circumstance. In our own strength we would crumble. In Your strength we can do whatever You call us to do. May we have thoughts of those who have gone on before and be prepared to “leap for joy because great is our reward in heaven” (Luke 6:23) and “rejoice that we would be counted worthy to suffer shame for His name” (Acts 6:41 ).

For those who are suffering now, physically, emotionally, spiritually–for dear unknown friends– please sustain, lift up, surround, give courage, take away doubts, misgivings, wavering, fear and dread and terror…Comfort, build up, remind of Your goodness, Your love, Your nearness, Your face, Your heaven.  May there be rejoicing and songs of praise coming from their lips–for the joy set before them. Please remind them that their suffering brings great eternal reward. It is not in vain. Remind them that I Peter  1:6-7 tells them that their faithful response in their sufferings validates their faith in God “even though tested by fire” that it “may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.” Remind them and us that the more we suffer for Him, the greater our capacity to glorify Him. That is a very great reward.

Lord Jesus, You who were persecuted and suffered–You who were tempted in all points as we are (yet without sin), please let your nearness be known to these precious children of Yours, keeping them faithful, not denying the Lord Who bought them, even in the face of death.

‘Thou art my protecting arm,
fortress, refuge, shield, buckler.
Fight for me and my foes must flee;
Uphold me and I cannot fall;
Strengthen me and I stand unmoved, unmovable,
Equip me and I shall receive no wound;
Stand by me and Satan will depart;
Anoint my lips with a song of salvation and I shall shout Thy victory.’ (From Valley of Vision)
Amen.

In the midst of all pain and suffering Jesus says, “Surely I am coming quickly.” He will make everything right. He will wipe away all tears. He will take away our anxieties and terrors and our sin forever.  Let us say with John,  “Amen. Even so, come, Lord Jesus!”

Look up, my friend, He IS coming again.

Cherry

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God’s Good “No” Answers

Dear Sister,

I recently read we should thank the Lord in the midst of our sufferings, in fact for our sufferings. That act draws us closer to Him and helps us through our dark times. In one of my all-time favorite books, The Hiding Place, Corrie Ten Boom and her sister do exactly that as they travel roads of unspeakable horror, yet find themselves blessed by God over and over again. My husband and I have also found God’s grace in His “no” answers.

Sometimes, though.

Oh, there are times that my spirit simply cries and hangs on for dear life. I cherish the verses in Romans, “In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words; and He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.” (Rom. 8:26-27) No formula, just remain in Him. He pleads for us. With His Father, with God. For us. There couldn’t be a better advocate, no one who understands me better.

How blessed are we?

I had to laugh through tears as I looked up this passage. I know I’ve read the chapter untold times, but until tonight I did not realize that these verses of the Spirit interceding for us is sandwiched between, “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” (Rom. 8:18) Unspeakable joy to come!

“And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” (Rom. 8:28) Satan’s plans for evil are thwarted by our loving Lord and turned to good.

“Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? … But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Rom. 8:35, 37-39) His assurance we are ever His beloved.

From crying out in desperation, too crushed to even formulate words in defense, to knowing with great surety our trials are not without a purpose, we are conquerors through Jesus—and not just that, but the best we can even dream of is merely a shadow of what is to come. Sweet sister, as you cry in your dark hours, cling to Him—He has great, beautiful plans for your tomorrows!

Running with you,

Rebecca

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Have Courage? How?

Dear sisters,

Two young Marines in Okinawa, Japan were driving in a car this weekend when a blown tire changed their lives forever. The car lost control and the Marines were both severely injured and rushed to the Naval hospital, where my surgeon friend quickly operated on their broken bodies. She was up tirelessly with them for most of the weekend attending to their many serious injuries. One of the Marines sustained a brain injury that put him in a coma with his life precariously hanging in the balance. My friend lovingly faced this young man’s parents and told them of his dire state. She was expecting wailing, tears, and anger, yet what she received was a smile spread across his mom’s face and told my friend that it was going to be OK because God was in control. Then the mom quickly went to praying over her comatose son instead of weeping and asking why.

Oh my sisters, what a courageous response to a seemingly hopeless situation! How could this mother look the death of her son in the eye, then raise those eyes to her heavenly Father in faith of His sovereign control of this heart-wrenching event? There was no fear. She believed and acted on the truth her heart knew despite what consequences might lay ahead. What a picture of courage.

The bible is full of examples of courageous men and women who believed, lived, acted, and stood for the truth despite the personal consequences they might face: Abraham leaving his homeland, Moses’s exodus out of Egypt, Daniel not following the diet of his foreign captors, the prostitute hiding Joshua and the spies, Ruth staying with Naomi, Esther facing the tyrant King Ahasuerus, all the prophets, John the Baptist telling Herod he was sinning, and so many more! Yet the ultimate example of having courage in hopeless times is our Savior Jesus, who sweated blood in agony over the events to come that night, yet still he obeyed His Father, which cost Him His life and ultimately gave us ours. He rose again, defeating death and giving us the foundation of our faith. Our sins are forgiven when we trust in Christ. This life’s crushing fear is courageously washed away by the hope of the gospel!

But how does that work in my own life? I can look to this sweet mom as an example of courage for today. She showed courage during her seemingly hopeless time by not choosing fear, which is the opposite of courage. She chose to believe, live, act, and stand for the truth despite the personal consequences she might face: the death of her son.

Oh sister, learn the truth of the Word! Ground yourself in the knowledge of what you have in Christ. Learn the characteristics of God that never change. Let this knowledge lead you to courageously act when what you fear the most comes. Stand up for what you believe when others mock. Walk away when others are toeing the line of sin. Having courage in seemingly hopeless times is hard work, yet the Spirit will be there to give you what you don’t have on your own.

Oh Lord! Help us to be strong and courageous and not tremble and be dismayed as we live a life of your Truth.

Your sister in Christ,

Colleen

 

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Kicking and Submitting

Dearest Sister,

Did you ever think about the beauty of arranged marriages? Well, in theory, beautiful. Ponder this: Assurance of marriage, no dating frustrations, little chance of endless break-ups and loneliness and heartaches typical of the “going together” scene. Yes, he might not be your dream man, but a good mother and father know what is in your best interest, right?

Maybe you are in a time of despair about such things–or despair about whatever it is in your life in this span of time. Dating, not dating, miserable dating. Marriage, no marriage, divorce. Children, no children, rebellious children. Loss of health. Separation. Impending death of a loved one. Death. Missing. Loneliness. Most of us have experienced some of these, some have known them all. Some of us are clinging desperately to our God, others are unsure, finding it hard to trust, even bitter.

No chastening or trials are pleasant. If we could only reckon the truth of God’s Word to actually be true. These things are for our good. They yield the peaceable fruit of righteousness in our lives if we submit to the training.

I’m a slow learner in the things of Christ…my tendency is to impatience.
I want things to happen now, in my timing, according to my educated plans. Marriage at twenty one, house with wrap-around porch, sea breezes blowing gently on my face as I watch my four children, two boys, two girls, playing in the sand a few hundred feet from that porch. A happily-ever-after marriage, some nice vacations involving travel to exotic destinations, and a body free of disease would be nice too. However, my plans rarely materialize and the visual above is merely a lovely dream of my youth. But, dear sister, in hindsight, the training in righteousness has been so much better.

Indulge me while I tell you of my first big lesson in true submission to our Christ. It is the story of idolatry, the crashing of the idol, and the place of eventual blessing. Perhaps you will be encouraged as you see yourself, in a different situation, but the same God of patience and love and gentleness.

We met, Jim and I, dated, “fell in love” (albeit a mostly selfish love), and grew stagnant, with no real commitment. Months grew into years, seven years, to be exact and then God saved our souls and transformed our lives. It was a marvelous thing to behold as we thirstily learned of Him and His ways for our lives, as we learned to walk in childlike obedience. Two more years passed. I was desperate for marriage, he was not. I blamed him, he blamed no one. Then came the ultimatums, the pressures, the guilt trips. The breakup inevitably came. The wrenching heartache of loss was felt by both, but God was working His relentless work in our hearts. I was brought to my knees in repentance over many things, including the idolatry of wanting this man more than I wanted submission to the very real possibility that God did not want me to be married to this man, perhaps not to be married at all. In His grace and hard mercy at the time, I gave all my desires, all my desperation, all my dreams to Christ, trusting (as my pastor says) in His Face (Who He is), not His hands (what He can give me). The sadness and loss did not leave, but there was a release I had not known. I was no longer bound to a dream idol, an idol of earthly fulfillment, an idol of personal happiness. I was a woman of metaphorical unclean lips who had now known the hot coals upon my mouth in cleansing, and my heart was ready for a “Here am I, send me for whatever He purposed” moment. (Isaiah 6).

I’m reminded of dear old Abraham. His longing for the son of promise, the fruition of the promise, the seeming wrenching away of that boy. A.W. Tozer says it so poignantly: “God let the suffering old man go through with it up to the point where He knew there would be no retreat, and then forbade him to lay a hand on the boy. To the wondering patriarch He now says in effect, ‘It’s all right, Abraham. I never intended that you should actually slay the lad. I only wanted to remove him from the temple of your heart that I might reign unchallenged there…’

I’ve had other lessons in submission along the way, but like first love, this first lesson is most memorable. It made the next lessons a bit easier because of God’s faithfulness in the first. Never easy, always good, because God is always good.

No, God does not always give us what we think we want, but when we submit, He gives us Himself. He is our very great reward, not to be traded for any earthly passion. And sometimes, not always…but sometimes, He says, ‘I wanted to give him to you all along, but first I wanted your heart.’

And there you have it. That is how I eventually became Mrs. Jim Finamore.

Sister, give Him all of you. Surrender wholeheartedly. Be content with or without the desire. Be satisfied with Christ.

Submitting together to Him,
Cherry