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A Faithful Example

Dear Sister,

We have all had the experience of hearing a new word or learning a new concept or discovering a once unfamiliar place on the planet.  What happens? It seems from that moment on the new vocabulary word or idea or location is constantly heard and one wonders why it was so unfamiliar before. When I was a little girl I recall hearing about Lake Tahoe and wondering where that was. A week later someone referred to it. Then I saw the words written in my father’s Time magazine. From then on it seemed to be everywhere.

This year I told you I wanted to write about faithfulness. Of course, the topic “faithfulness” is cropping up all over before my eyes and ears…in articles, in books, in the Scriptures.

Today I began going over the story of Joseph in my Old Testament readings and you know it, faithfulness leaps from the pages. From the text you’d think that Joseph never sinned unless you think he was arrogant in the recounting of his dreams to his brothers and father, telling them that they would bow down to him. God is not shy about telling us of the sins and weaknesses of many characters in His Word. With others,  like Joseph and Daniel, the Lord spares us from the telling of their sin, of which we are all guilty. I believe God wants us to zero in on their faithfulness, for our example, for edification and encouragement to be like-minded.

As I read through Joseph’s story (check it out in Genesis 37, 39-50) I’m struck by his faithfulness to God and His reputation throughout the events narrated in the Scriptures. Joseph was the favorite of his father, thus incurring the jealousy and wrath of his brothers.  He appears to be in submission to his father, obedient in the errands his father asked of him. The brothers’ envy resulted in the pretend death of Joseph and the selling of him to traders on their way to Egypt–We know what happened there. Potiphar, his wicked wife, prison, dreams, the interpretation of dreams, a baker and cupbearer, Pharaoh himself, and Joseph’s eventual rise to a position in the government of the land.

Until Egypt we did not know where Joseph stood in his relationship with the Lord. In his new home with Potiphar we see that Joseph pursues excellence in all that he does. He was unusually gifted and handsome to boot. The Scriptures tell us that his master “saw that the Lord was with Him and that the Lord made all he did to prosper in his hand. So Joseph found favor in his sight…” and Potiphar made him overseer of all his home, second only to the master himself. “The Lord blessed the Egyptian’s house for Joseph’s sake…” And then Potiphar’s woman came along and tried to seduce this excellent young man. She badgered him day after day but he resisted. His final answer was, “How then can I do this great wickedness against God?” Power and prestige and a woman’s siren call did not do their negative work on this young man. And yet, he is accused of attempted rape and consigned to prison.

Lesser men or women would have thrown in the towel by this time. “Why me?”, we would cry out. “What have I done to deserve this? I was a good son. My brothers hated me and sold me into slavery. Not my fault.  I’ll never see my father again. I did right by Potiphar and where did that get me? I’m in prison. Woe is me!” The Bible tells us, “But the Lord was with Joseph and showed him mercy, and he gave him favor in the sight of the keeper of the prison.” In this dismal environment he is once again noticed for his excellent character and abilities and is elevated to a high position, this time as overseer of all the prisoners.  Again we are told that “the Lord was with him, and whatever he did, the Lord made it prosper.”

Fast forward…In interpreting the dreams of two of the Pharoah’s servants, now prisoners, he gives God the credit for his knowledge of the meanings. “Do not interpretations belong to God?” Eventually, through a series of events, Joseph is brought before the Pharaoh for more dream interpretation. Again he gives the credit to God. “It is not in me; God will give Pharaoh an answer of peace.”

Please read the story for yourself of how this superb young man is once again raised to a position of power, this time second only to Pharaoh, the king; how Joseph meets up with his brothers again and tests them to give him understanding of their hearts’ condition; his tender meeting with his daddy after so many years, as if resurrected from the dead; his father’s eventual death and his brothers’ fear that now Joseph will seek revenge for their great sin against him all those years before. Classic Joseph: “Do not be afraid, for am I in the place of God? But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive. Now therefore, do not be afraid…”  Joseph’s last recorded words were to the children of Israel, “…you shall carry my bones from here” to the land God had promised to Abraham, to Isaac, to Jacob. In the New Testament book of Hebrews 11:22 we are retold that “By faith, Joseph, when he was dying, made mention of the departure of the children of Israel, and gave instruction according to his bones.”

“Why all this?”,  you say, my sister. We are talking about faithfulness. God’s faithfulness is written all over Joseph’s story throughout all his severe trials from beginning to end. It is only because of His faithfulness to us that we can even begin to be faithful to Him.  But I am also drawn to Joseph’s faithfulness to our God. You and I have copies of the Bible scattered all around our houses. We have phones and tablets and apps and a myriad other tools at our fingertips. We have no excuse for not having a proper theology of God and His character, His ways, His promises for a future for ourselves and our people, not yet realized. Yet we falter and are often unfaithful in one way or another, even in the smallest things, let alone the biggies. Joseph had no copy of the Scriptures to read at night for encouragement when he was suffering. (Moses was not yet born, the author of Genesis.) He did not have Christian counselors or pastors or any books on victory through suffering. He had no family around him to offer shelter and comfort.  No, but He knew God, that He was Sovereign and in control of all things and that he, Joseph, would answer to God for his actions. He learned what he knew of God from his father, no doubt, and a personal walk with the Heavenly Father based on the truths he knew about God. We learn this from the few words of his recorded in the Scriptures, written for us as an example and to be encouraged and spurred on to faithfulness in our own lives.

Forgive me, O God, when I complain about anything in my life. Grant me faithfulness to You as Joseph was faithful–and more so like my Savior, Jesus Christ, the only One who is perfectly faithful.

Love

Cherry

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Perfection Problems

 

Dear sister,

I hate to break it to you, but life is not perfect, and neither are you.When I was a kid, my mom would remind me, “Karlie, you are not perfect, and you never will be. You might as well realize this now.” This may sound harsh, but I really struggled with perfectionism as a kid, to the point of frustration. Basically, she was saying life is not perfect and putting my hope in something that I cannot obtain is hopeless. Telling someone they are not perfect may sound discouraging, but it can be exhausting expecting perfection in a fallen world.

So does that mean we stop striving for perfection? We desire perfection, but often look to the wrong places for perfection. I usually put my hope in planning. If everything goes according to plan, my life will be perfect. But life is not perfect; relationships fall through, cars break down, family members get sick, etc. So what do we do? Well, if you are like me, I worry. At least then I feel like I am being productive. But in the end I find worrying doesn’t accomplish anything other than raise my stress level.

“The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”  (Philippians 4:5b-7)

I am not the one in control. Worry only reveals a heart that does not fully trust the Lord with all things. If God can take care of the birds of the air and the lilies of the field (Matt. 6:25-34), why do we doubt His care for you and me?

This year, I’ve made it my goal to stress less and trust God more. Will life go according to my plan this year? Probably not, and if hard times haven’t come, they are probably just around the corner. Yet what looks like failure or a mistake to us may just be God’s plan from the beginning. It’s frustrating when plans don’t work out, but that’s life. Thankfully, we cannot ruin God’s plan. His ways are above our ways and His timing is perfect, even if it does not fit our timeline. When faced with disappointments, we need to rejoice and trust in Him. After all, nothing is supposed to be perfect, on this side of heaven.

I guess my mom was partially correct, I am not perfect, but I am being perfected every day. As Paul says later in Philippians: “Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own” (Philippians 3:12).

We will be perfect someday, as He is perfect. When life doesn’t go according to plan, we need to look to the One who is perfect and makes us perfect in Christ; rest in His perfection.

In Christ,

Karlie

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Always Faithful

Dear Sister,

During this year, 2017, I was thinking I would write to you about faithfulness, mostly God’s. But, in thinking about His faithfulness, I could not help but think about His always goodness in His faithfulness.  And His steadfast love. And His gentleness. And His sometimes severe mercy. All of these are within His faithfulness and trustworthiness. In the chaos of this life, He is all of these things.

As I sit in a hospital room with my dear mother for the second time in the first seventeen days of this new year there is much time to think and to ask God to sort out, not the chaos of the circumstances ultimately, but the chaos swirling in my mind. During my group Bible Study this week we discussed God as our true reference point and we were asked to introspect and determine if we actually live with that truth in our souls or do we revert to ourselves as our reference point?  I’m  thinking about that now as I write. Will I give in to thoughts of how this present hospital room is affecting me, how can I fix this, how will I cope, can I muster more strength for the circumstance at hand? Or, will I surrender my body and soul and weakness and anxieties to the Lord God and trust what I know to be true about Him and His ways according to His Word? My choice.

The other evening I was poring over ancient photograph albums…the kind where the yellowed photos are inserted into four little arrow-like holders at each corner, placed meticulously on black album pages.

As I viewed these familiar pictures and the faces of my birth family at various stages of growing up I was reminded of a prayer from Valley of Vision to our “All-Sufficient King” and wondered why I fret so often.

“Thou has been mindful of me and visited me,

Taken charge of me from birth,

Cared in all conditions for me,

Fed me at Thy table,

Drawn curtains of love around me,

Given me new mercies every morning.”

And that reminded me of Lamentations…The prophet Jeremiah laments the terrible sins of his people and his own.  He sees his and their wretchedness before the pure and holy God.

And that reminded me of me. Wretched, always sinning, impure motives, inconstant, un-even tempered, irritable, idol-worshipping.

Back to Jeremiah. God writes through the prophet:

“Judah had gone into exile because of affliction and hard servitude;

She dwells now among the nations,

But finds no resting place;

Her pursuers have all overtaken her

In the midst of her distress…

Jerusalem sinned grievously;

Therefore she became filthy;

All who honored her despise her,

For they have seen her nakedness;

She herself groans

And turns her face away….

The Lord is in the right,

For I have rebelled against His word;

But hear, all you peoples,

And see my suffering;

My young women and my young men have gone into captivity.

The Lord has done what He purposed;

He has carried out His Word,

Which He commanded long ago;

He has thrown down without pity;

He has made the enemy rejoice over you and exalted the might of your foes.”

Faithfulness. Faithful in His judgments. Faithful in His love. Faithful to His promises. What does it mean? We have the usual dictionary definitions:

allegiance, adherence, constancy, loyalty.

Faithful to my spouse. Faithful to my children.  Faithful to care for my mother. Faithful to my church family. Faithful to my country. Following through on all my commitments. Faithful to obey. Keeping my word whether for blessing or for confrontation and discipline (which are also blessings).

God was faithful to His children, Israel. He had promised blessing for obedience and severe chastening for disobedience. And He followed through. No inconstancy with God.

And then, Jeremiah does not leave them in the discouragement and loneliness of exile forever.

Scripture is filled with doxologies after all that has gone on before.

“Remember my affliction and my roamings, the wormwood and the gall!

My soul still remembers and sinks within me. This I recall to my mind, therefore I have hope: ‘Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed. Because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; GREAT IS YOUR FAITHFULNESS.'”

Right now I’m “feeling” a bit exiled, not because I really am, not because of personal disobedience, but because of God’s perfect ordinations in my life and the life of all my family–and sometimes His ordinations are hard. As a result, this grand doxology from Jeremiah comforts my weary soul. It is as true today as it was for Judah–for those who belong to Jesus Christ by grace alone through faith alone through Christ alone.

My circumstances remain the same this January day but my mind and my heart are beginning to be filled with order again as I am bringing my disorderly thoughts  into captivity to the obedience of Christ.  My present and my future are secured by my faithful God, no matter what course my life or my mama’s life may take. Not because of my faithfulness, but His.

Love,

Cherry

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Lessons in Counseling

Dear sister,

I have a confession to make…

I went to counseling.

What, not dramatic enough for you? That’s the funny thing about counseling. Talking to a professional about your problems is either perceived as completely normal or completely taboo.

Growing up, I used to think counseling was the magic pill that would fix all of my family’s problems. We never actually went, but every time there was some sort of family conflict I was convinced counseling would solve everything.

For a while now I’ve known I want to become a counselor. Yet I had never gone to counseling myself. You know how the flight attendant instructs you to place the face mask on yourself before helping the person next to you? Well, I finally realized I needed to help myself. Every time I go through a transition or crisis in my life, I feel paralyzed by a fear of pain; I try to move on, but feel so alone and scared. I think I’ve done a good job dealing with my fears myself, but there is nothing wrong with asking for help.

Going into counseling, I thought we would talk about problems outside of my control, but I quickly realized the problem wasn’t a particular person or situation, but how I responded to them. Counseling deals with the deeper heart issues. The problem wasn’t external, it was found within. As a people-pleaser, I hate confrontation, in part because I don’t want to hurt people, but mainly because I don’t want to get hurt myself. This can manifest as manipulation, selfishness, enabling, idolater of relationships, etc.

I have another confession to make.

Counseling didn’t fix me.

Counseling exposed my sin and what I needed to change, but I didn’t want to. At one part during my counseling, I did not complete my homework and had to admit to actually doing the opposite of what I was instructed to do. I knew what was right, but I wasn’t willing to obey. My counselor pointed me to the weak willed women in 2 Timothy who were led astray by their sins and wrong desires. They were “always learning and never able to arrive at a knowledge of the truth” (2 Tim. 3:7). They knew the truth, but they had not learned anything from it. I could go to counseling for years, read all the books, listen to all the sermons, but unless I change my ways, I haven’t actually learned anything. It’s not enough to know the truth; you have to act according to the truth as well.

Although I’ve concluded my counseling sessions, I am by no means perfect and will never be, not until God calls me home. Some struggles go away with time; others are a struggle for life. That’s why sanctification is a process. Our focus shouldn’t be on “fixing ourselves”, instead we need to focus on Christ and who we are in Him.

I hope to learn from my counseling; I want to change and grow, but I can’t do it alone. If I’ve learned one thing from counseling, it’s that I need to pray for God’s help more. Only He can change hearts. That’s why He gave us the Spirit.

“For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control” (2 Timothy 1:7).

The Spirit is the ultimate counselor who enables us and brings true comfort. As it says in 2 Corinthians 5:17, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” So there is hope; you and I can obey His truth because He has given us a new heart and is at work within us. We are not going to be perfect, so continually repent, strive, and pray for help. And most importantly, trust in God. He is not done with us yet.

In Christ,

Karlie

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Leaning Forward

 

“ Brothers (Sisters), I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead,  I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:13-14

 

My dear sister,

Today’s Scripture reading reminded me of the importance of “leaning forward” in my faith and not looking behind (like the wife of Lot did becoming a pillar of salt-Genesis 19:26).  Instead, I am to look ahead in the confidence of 2 Corinthians 5:17.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.”

I am indeed a new creation, one that God has and is fitting for the tasks in front of me, those having been sovereignly ordained for me before time began. (Ephesians 2:10)

“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” 

All things are in His hands, including every moment of every day of 2017; therefore, I can surrender this year to Him and his perfect will; trusting and abiding in His Goodness and Love. Knowing that everything is working together for my good and His glory. (Romans 8:28-30)

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers.”

I pray that you will enter this New Year with the assurance of who you are in Christ and with the goal in your heart to bring Him glory in whatever you either do or that comes by way of life to you.  Lean forward my dear sister, lean forward.

Your sister,

Susan