My dear Sister,
It came to my attention that your heart is aching…aching because of a longing, a yearning which is not yielding the desired results. You’ve prayed so much. You have begged the Lord–but you only hear silence.
I was not told what it is you are longing for, but oh, how I have a sense of what you are experiencing. No, I cannot say I know just what you are feeling. It isn’t comforting when someone says those words, “I know exactly what you’re going through”, because no mortal can know exactly how another experiences a trial. I can have a glimmer of it, but not fully. You are different from me and I from you, but I can tell you of that One who knows you perfectly, the One who was tempted in all points like you. He tells you that He feels your infirmity with full knowledge and will help you in your time of great need. (Hebrews 4:15-16 )
I will try to encourage you, try to comfort you, but my words will always fall short, certainly not for want of trying. This One I am telling you about will never fall short or fail you. Our great Savior, through the Psalmist, tells us that unless He is our help, our souls would settle in silence. He says that when our feet slip, He will hold us up. And the author of Psalm 94:17-19 also says that when we are filled with anxieties, as you are at this time, God’s comforts will delight our souls.
Dear, dear sister…In your very real yearning and anxiety and even emptiness, immerse yourself in the Psalms. There you will find our God in all His goodness and tenderness and comfort and power and majesty. You will have taken a deep course in Theology. When you make it a habit of viewing Him in His beauty through His Word, your trouble in the present will blur, even dim. If you practice lifting your heart in responsive praise because of Who He is in spite of your agony, you will begin to view your situation with new eyes, eyes that dwell more on the beauty of the Savior than on the grief and unrequited desire.
What I have said to you was expressed beautifully by that Puritan of old, Thomas Chalmers, when he talked about “the expulsive power of a new affection”. When we love God more than our own desires, even desires for good things, our affection for Christ will expel our affinity for the things of this world.
My suffering sister, commit to loving Him above all else. Stay your mind on Him. Sing. Worship. He will give you His peace, (Isaiah 26:3)… His joy…Such freedom from care…Such grace…Such resolution for the sadness of the soul…Such hope in your pain. As the old chorus says, “Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
look full in His wonderful face, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace.”
If you will begin to think and act in these ways, you may find your situation remaining the same, but your perspective, your heart’s desire, your vision will change and you will become more like our Savior, in whose image you are made. And that is just what He wants–and what He wants is always good. Always.
Oh, yes. One more thing. Think of this when the tendency is to dwell on yourself because of the pain–your suffering actually redounds to His great glory. It is putting Him on display. His mighty strength is made perfect in your utter weakness. How lovely is that!
I love you and will continue to pray for you in your journey.
Love in God’s Truth and His mercy,
Your Sister in Christ,
Cherry