Tag: Comfort

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The Sweetest Comfort I Know

My dear sister,

Have you ever noticed that in the months of November and December people in general consume a lot of sweets?  Sweet sugary foods are well known for the comfort and sense of pleasure they bring to those who eat them.  Experts say that sugar creates a chemical  reaction which washes over several areas of our brains all at once.  This is why when sweet foods are eaten they often give us the same feelings as those we experience when talking with a close friend and/ or watching our favorite movie.  With all of these “good time” feelings being experienced it makes it hard to stop or at the very least to slow down.  We, similar to the addict of other sensor pleasing substances, are looking for and anticipating that next wave of comfort.

The end of the calendar year is also infamous for people seeking personal happiness to a greater degree.  The world around us shouts: “Rejoice!” or “Joy, joy, joy!” and “Making spirits bright, laughing all the way… ho, ho, ho!”  This is not only annoying on the surface level but it is gut wrenching for those who are dealing with broken relationships, pain of loss and loneliness.

When people are unhappy with life they tend to want “some happiness” so the eyes and then the hands turn toward a quick easy fix… which is usually something sweet.  Ahh, the sweet rush of comfort that floods our minds so that we don’t have to think about missing someone or parenting our unruly child or being a helper and not a hinderer to our husbands etc.  “Hurry”, we say to ourselves; “bring me some Figgie pudding or I shall die!” No, I don’t think it is a coincidence that all of this craving for happiness which leads us to an over consumption of sugar is especially tied to this season of the year.

It is my observation that even my brothers and sisters in Christ are prone to wander into the land of sugar plums, candy canes and sweets galore.  Even when we know and proclaim that “Jesus is the reason for the season”.  Somehow our hearts disengage from our minds and before we know it we too are free falling into a sugar coma on our couch as the Hallmark Christmas Movie Marathon wanes on and on and on in the background. Like everyone else we awake with an even deeper ache in our stomachs (sometimes literally and not just figuratively).

So, what to do? Certainly we can have our cake and eat it too right? The key to true comfort my dear sister is to first recognize that you are hooked on a false sense of comfort. I mean, hello who doesn’t want the real deal? The purest form of true comfort comes from knowing our Heavenly Father who happens to  know all things, especially the things that bring comfort or discomfort to our souls.  He not only knows all things He has created all things, including our hearts which long for comfort and peace at a time when it seems hopeless to us.  He sees the bigger picture, yes, even beyond November and December each year. His perspective is eternal, it stretches from Alpha to Omega. We can trust Him to help us, to comfort us, to deliver us …

The sweetest comfort we can ever know my dear sister is already ours! He is Jesus Christ, the precious Son of God.  He is our true comfort in all times and in all ways. He is our true joy! He is our true strength! Why not feed on what is true and not false? Maybe you have already overindulged in what gives you a false sense of comfort, it is never too late to put that cookie down and to embrace the true and better comfort.

My prayer for all of us as we enter into a new year is that we will finish well (all the way to next November and December) and that we will fix our eyes on the best, the sweetest, prize of all, Jesus!  Unlike those cookies and candies He never grows old or stale. I will leave off with comforting words from the great comforter:

The LORD is my chosen portion and my cup;
you hold my lot.
The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.
I bless the LORD who gives me counsel;
in the night also my heart instructs me.
I have set the LORD always before me;
because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken.
Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices;
my flesh also dwells secure.
For you will not abandon my soul to Sheol,
or let your holy one see corruption.
You make known to me the path of life;
in your presence there is fullness of joy;
at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

Your sister in Christ,

Susan

 

 

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Redounding to His Glory

My dear Sister,

It came to my attention that your heart is aching…aching because of a longing, a yearning which is not yielding the desired results. You’ve prayed so much. You have begged the Lord–but you only hear silence.

I was not told what it is you are longing for, but oh, how I have a sense of what you are experiencing. No, I cannot say I know just what you are feeling. It isn’t comforting when someone says those words, “I know exactly what you’re going through”, because no mortal can know exactly how another experiences a trial. I can have a glimmer of it, but not fully. You are different from me and I from you, but I can tell you of that One who knows you perfectly, the One who was tempted in all points like you. He tells you that He feels your infirmity with full knowledge and will help you in your time of great need. (Hebrews 4:15-16 )

I will try to encourage you, try to comfort you, but my words will always fall short, certainly not for want of trying. This One I am telling you about will never fall short or fail you. Our great Savior, through the Psalmist, tells us that unless He is our help, our souls would settle in silence. He says that when our feet slip, He will hold us up. And the author of Psalm 94:17-19 also says that when we are filled with anxieties, as you are at this time, God’s comforts will delight our souls.

Dear, dear sister…In your very real yearning and anxiety and even emptiness, immerse yourself in the Psalms. There you will find our God in all His goodness and tenderness and comfort and power and majesty. You will have taken a deep course in Theology. When you make it a habit of viewing Him in His beauty through His Word, your trouble in the present will blur, even dim. If you practice lifting your heart in responsive praise because of Who He is in spite of your agony, you will begin to view your situation with new eyes, eyes that dwell more on the beauty of the Savior than on the grief and unrequited desire.

What I have said to you was expressed beautifully by that Puritan of old, Thomas Chalmers, when he talked about “the expulsive power of a new affection”. When we love God more than our own desires, even desires for good things, our affection for Christ will expel our affinity for the things of this world.

My suffering sister, commit to loving Him above all else. Stay your mind on Him. Sing. Worship. He will give you His peace, (Isaiah 26:3)… His joy…Such freedom from care…Such grace…Such resolution for the sadness of the soul…Such hope in your pain. As the old chorus says, “Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
look full in His wonderful face, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace.”

If you will begin to think and act in these ways, you may find your situation remaining the same, but your perspective, your heart’s desire, your vision will change and you will become more like our Savior, in whose image you are made. And that is just what He wants–and what He wants is always good. Always.

Oh, yes. One more thing. Think of this when the tendency is to dwell on yourself because of the pain–your suffering actually redounds to His great glory. It is putting Him on display. His mighty strength is made perfect in your utter weakness. How lovely is that!

I love you and will continue to pray for you in your journey.

Love in God’s Truth and His mercy,

Your Sister in Christ,
Cherry

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It’s Just Not Fair

My Dearest Sister,

​”Life isn’t fair.”

​I can’t tell you how many times I heard that phrase said to me when I was growing up. From parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents, teachers, you name it. Any time I complained because another kid seemed to have it better than me, any time I got angry because I had to do some boring chore that no one else possibly had to do, and any time I uttered the words “It’s not fair!”, that phrase seemed to be the appropriate response. And as hard of a pill as that is for an eight-year-old to swallow, it’s true. Life really is not fair sometimes. The worst part is, it can be more unfair to some than it is to others. Sure, we will all have suffering and pain, Jesus promised us that (John 16:33). But we each suffer in different ways at different times in our lives. Sometimes we suffer in ways we deserve; We call those consequences. Other times though, we suffer in ways that are so wrongful and unjust that we can’t help but ask the question “Lord… Why?”

​The topic of suffering has weighed heavy on my heart this past week. You see, last week an Army wife friend of mine lost her dear husband, a hero and defender of our nation’s freedom. His helicopter was shot down on his first deployment to Afghanistan, just a few short months after graduating flight school. Today, she will stand alongside their family and friends and bury her beloved; today, she will have to say goodbye. And then somehow she will have to continue on in this life. She is now the widow of a fallen soldier and a single mother of two young boys. Her sons will have to grow up without ever really knowing their earthly father; never waving goodbye to him on their first day of school, never playing catch with him in the yard, never being taught by him how to shave; the youngest, who is only eight months old, will never even get to smile up at him with pride as he takes his first steps or says his first words. Though his memory will live on in those who loved him, he has gone to be with Jesus, even if it does seem too soon. It is at times like these that I can only ask, “Lord, why?” Why would God allow so much suffering to come upon this sweet and faithful little family? It just isn’t fair.

​I have heard many people say that if God really loved us, He wouldn’t allow suffering and pain to come upon innocent and undeserving people. Maybe you have encountered someone in your life that thinks this way. This concept of wrongful suffering is such a stumbling block to them that they want nothing to do with God whatsoever, believing Him to be this big bully in the sky who just stands by and lets bad things happen to us, who just watches us stumble and fall. Oh, sister, how misled they are! The truth about suffering is that it is just yet another symptom of the disease of sin in this fallen world. Ever since Adam and Eve were banished from the garden, sorrow and hardships have been a regular part of life. All over the world people suffer wrongfully, on a daily basis: Women are beaten. Girls are sold as sex slaves. Children starve. Young husbands and fathers die. This suffering is not always deserved or fair and some will experience more than others, but it is there because of man’s sin, not for a lack of God’s love.

​Quite the opposite in fact, for His love provides a treatment for suffering. The Bible says that the Lord tends to the brokenhearted and sorrowful (Psalm 34:18), healing deep wounds that no one else can even touch. Our Mighty Father gives power to the weak, to those who cannot stand in their own strength (Isaiah 40:29). He comforts us in our tribulation so that we may in turn comfort others (2 Corinthians 1:3-4). We may not always understand why some endure such wrongful suffering in their life, but the love of Christ that has been freely given to us surpasses all of our understanding (Ephesians 3:19). He is the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort, and oh, how He loves us and wants to make us whole! All we have to do is reach out our arms and let Him lift us up out of our sorrow.

​Just as God’s comfort is the treatment for suffering here on earth, Christ’s return is the complete cure. In Revelation 21:4, God promises of a time where suffering will be a thing of the past: “’And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there will be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.’ Then He who sat on the throne said, ‘Behold, I make all things new.’” Yes dear friend, we will suffer in this world, that much is true; but praise the Lord it is only temporary! There is coming a day when this bitterness will pass away and all things will be new in Christ. My friend will see her husband again, not in this wretched world where suffering abounds, but in a place where we will worship the Risen King in all His glory. No more heartache. No more pain. God himself will wipe away our tears as He welcomes us into His new kingdom. Take heart my sister, for this is our promise and our hope in Him, both now and forevermore!

​Your hopeful sister in Christ,
Lauren
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The Dragon’s Final Fatal Spasms

Dear sister,

~I had gotten the email Sunday morning Thailand time.  It shocked me to the core.  While living in Virginia I worked with an amazing Young Life staff who taught me how to meet teens where they were at.  There was one couple in particular who just exuded a love for Christ and each other that I had yet to see elsewhere. They were magnets to teens seeking joy and peace in the throws of high school chaos and awkwardness.  The husband came home from work that day to have lunch with his wife and brand new baby girl.  He just loved his family and wanted to spend some extra precious minutes with them. On the way back to work the authorities believe the sun blinded him and he ran off the road and was killed.  My heart broke for his wife, precious girl, and all those who knew him.  But the real tears came as I helped lead worship at church that morning with the song “God is so Good”.  At that moment, I did not believe those words and I left in tears.

~I woke up from the anesthesia hearing my name being called.  A few seconds later tears filled my eyes as I realized the beloved twins that once were alive inside me, were now gone.  I still feel the ache and tears now fill my eyes as I type.

How as Christians do we grieve to the glory of God?  Do we plaster a grin and say we are “fine”?  Do we fake it till we make it?  Is that what this Christian life is about?  Only good things should happen to believers, never sad, confusing or hurtful times?  Oh sweet sister, the Bible is full of grieving people…even the Lord Jesus himself grieved…even God the Father grieved at the death of his Son!  Yes, there is a way to grieve to the glory of God that does not minimize our hurt and pain.

We first need to realize that death was not in the original Garden of Eden.  Sin was not there.  So when we grieve death, we do so rightly.  Death is the result of sin that came from Adam’s disobedience to God which carries with it the curse of death to all who followed in life.  It reminds us that this world is broken.  Yet it is also a reminder that Christ came to CONQUER death!  Death has been and will be defeated.  It was slain at the cross and we wait for Christ to come again and stop the dragon’s final fatal spasms.

So as Christians, death hits us hard as we know that it is a result of a sin laden earth.  We grieve because of the destruction it brings.  So let the tears and groans come.  Know the Father grieves too.  But do not grieve without hope.

  • Be honest with what you are feeling:
    • The psalms are full of examples; let them guide you (Ps 13, 22, 38, 42, 55, 59, 61, and 88).  Bring your grief to the Lord, he above all understands what it means to grieve.
  • Seek Godly comfort:
    • It will be easy to run to the TV, food, exercise, memories, music, work, or other people but they will not give you lasting comfort.  Jesus Christ is our lasting comfort as He is the one who conquered death by dying and rising again!  Run to Him above all else.  Yes, you can use the others as tools, but not your respite.  Christ is your ultimate comfort (2 Cor. 1:3-4).
  • Resist Temptations:
    • You will be vulnerable when you are in grief.  Resist the temptation to doubt God’s goodness, mercy, grace, and love.  You may not feel like He is those things but remember He never changes.  Be careful not to be angry with God, envy others who have not felt your grief, or fall into self-pity.  Serve others.
  • Use Your Resources:
    • This is when we really need to lean into our church family for support.  We need them to help us remember the Truth and not believe the lies.  Read the Word.  Read the Word.  Read the Word.  Even if you don’t feel like it.
  • Remember your Blessings:
    • The Lord does promise good out of all things.  Actively look for them

I had never understood the pain of a miscarriage until I had one.  Since that day, my heart aches for each couple who experiences this loss.  I can grieve with them, cry with them, hurt with them, and offer them hope as one who understands what they are going through.  Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 says that there is “a time for everything”, even a time to mourn, lose, die, and break down…but it also says there is a time to laugh, build up, and live. “There is a season for everything under the sun”.  Yes grieve, but don’t stay there, let the Lord use you to then comfort others (2 Corinthians 1:3).   Grief is real, but so is the comfort of Christ.

Your sister in Christ,

Colleen

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Daunting Disappointment

 

Dear Sister,

Oh man, there I was, gazing at a steaming undercooked brownie crowned with vanilla ice cream that began to melt as it was placed carefully on the mass of brownie goodness.  I grabbed for the ordered dessert and noticed the caramel sauce sweetly simmering on top…and then I noticed the nuts.  I hate nuts.  It was almost enough to make me not even take a bite of the exuberantly priced prize that just moments ago looked like the answer to another bad day.  

I opened the mailbox to see yet another letter rejecting me from medical school.  My heart fell and I even got angry.  I told the letter how big of a mistake it was to reject the finest doctor they could have ever graduated.

The stick silently screamed once again that I was not pregnant.

Pain and sadness from disappointment is very real no matter how it is presented.  It can rear itself anywhere from an order made wrong to a marriage gone bad.  Each case seems just as painful at the moment.  How can that be?  How can I be just as disappointed from nuts on ice cream to a husband who no longer sees or hears me?  It is because at that moment, no matter what it is, I am trying to find my joy and contentment from something of this world.  I think the perfect brownie sundae or marriage will make life that much sweeter.  When it doesn’t, I am dreadfully disappointed.  Have you ever felt that way?  What are we to do with this discouraging disappointment?

First of all sweet sister, know that we can find encouragement that Christ was also disappointed in his time here on earth.  His disciples really bumbled around his teachings and showed lack of faith when Jesus taught or performed miracles.  On the hardest day of his life, his three closest friends should have been his dearest comfort, yet they couldn’t even stay awake with him as heanguished in prayer.  He knows what it is like to be disappointed.  But he is also the One who paid the ultimate price so we will never be disappointed ultimately again.  Our sins are forgiven forever, our debt is paid, and we have the hope of heaven!  Jesus not only understands disappointment, he made a way to overcome them forever!

So let us pray when disappointment claws at our hearts that we will remember three things: 1) Jesus is a mediator who understands what we are going through because he has experienced it; 2) Our disappointment shows us our sin of trying to find contentment in this world; and 3) Our ultimate salvation, joy and hope is in Christ, not in anything of this world.

Your sister in Christ,

Colleen