My Dear Sister,
I was still awake…way past my bedtime. My parents were still not home, even though they said they would be. My mind raced: Were they raptured and I was left behind? Were they in a car accident? Will they ever come home? Will I be alone? The fear of losing those I loved most kept me awake till I heard the garage door being opened.
I had the nightmare again…ticks and leaches falling through the ceiling. I have a fear of all things that suck my blood: ticks, leaches, vampires, and needles to name a few. I won’t walk in tall grass or soak in stagnant water. I close my eyes before a needle is even presented and I will not see movies with vampires…even those in love.
Fear is an interesting thing. It can be good motivator when it motivates us to help those in need or protect ourselves and others when faced with danger. And it is right and Godly when we…well…when we fear God. But when fear presents itself due to not trusting the Lord, it becomes an ungodly and sinful fear for which we must repent.
This paralyzing ungodly fear focuses on circumstances, not on the Lord. We fear something more than we fear God. I feared being left behind more than I trusted that the Lord would take care of me. I feared pain and torture more than trusting that the Lord would not give me more than I could bear with His strength. I’ve noticed lately that I would rather live in my fear so things can only get better rather than seek to trust and that trust be broken. But then I realized I am trusting in the wrong things and people. The Lord will never leave me nor forsake me. If my husband, child, friend, parent, bank account, or comfort leave, do I trust the Lord that He won’t? Am I satisfied in Him?
Sweet sister, am I alone in this? Oh how we need to renew our minds. We need to repent of the sin of unbelief that the Lord has us in His hand. We need to remind ourselves that God is sovereign (Is 46:9-11; Gen 50:20; Jer 32:27), He helps us in times of need (Is 41:10; 2 Cor 12:9; Heb 4:16), and we can seek His help when fear is at our doorstep (Ps 34:4; Ps 46:1-3). We have heard that perfect love casts out all fear, and this is true, but trusting the Lord and His promises are the key to overcoming sinful fear. Do you trust Him…do I?
Your Sister,
Colleen