Author: Lauren Titcomb

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The Heart’s Tongue

My Dearest Sister,

​For as long as I can remember, I’ve had a bit of an obsession with words. Their various meanings, spellings, and contexts have always fascinated me. Even though there are only twenty six letters in the English alphabet, when they are combined in different ways they can create over a quarter of a million words, each one unique. And when these words are combined again into sentences they create something that allows for the expression of thoughts and communication. Twenty-six letters structured in specific ways create language, without which we could not exist in the same capacity as we do today. Words, you see, are immensely powerful things. It is no wonder that God advises us to be careful with our words. After all, He is the One who gave us the ability to speak, so He more than anyone knows the capability of our tongues, both for good and for evil.

​Because words and sin often go hand in hand, there are many instances in which God warns us about the potential danger in our tongues. Proverbs 10:19 says that “in the multitude of words sin is not lacking, but he who restrains his lips is wise.” Words just fly out so easily sometimes don’t they? Even the ones we didn’t mean to say. That’s the problem with words; Once we speak them, they can’t be unspoken. This is precisely why the Lord warns us against not restraining our lips. He would rather us be silent and righteous than chatty and sinful. James 3:5-6 tells us a little more about just how dangerous our speech can be: “Even so the tongue is a little member and boasts great things… [It] is so set among our members that it defiles the whole body, and sets on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire by hell.” The enemy loves it when we we are nasty with our words because it can have such a broad effect in every area of our lives. Sinful speech is pervasive, like a forest fire, and once it spreads it is incredibly hard to control. That’s why we are warned so strongly against letting our tongues run wild. What’s more, our fiery words have lasting consequences. Jesus tells us in Matthew 12:36-37 that we will be held accountable in the judgement for every idle word we speak. “By your words you will be justified,” He says, “and by your words you will be condemned.” Our words, no matter how trivial they may seem in the moment, will stick with us until we meet God face to face. We will then have to answer for everything we have spoken, both the good and the bad. That may be something to think about the next time you find yourself tempted to say something that you know won’t please the Lord.

​So we see that God is very adamant about having control over our words. But why has He made them so important that they touch our very souls? Why are the consequences so great and the dangers so high? Our words mean a lot to God because they are directly related to the state of our hearts. In Matthew 12:34-35, the same passage mentioned above, Jesus says the following: “For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good things, and an evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth evil things.” So it’s not so much about the words themselves, sister, as it is about the heart behind the words. If we are good and godly, as God says we are to be, then shouldn’t our words be filled with good treasure? If not, then what does that say about the state of our hearts?

​The only way to fix a sinful tongue then, is to fix the sinful heart first. How do we accomplish such a monumental task as that? Well, if what is coming out our hearts are sinful, evil things then it stands to reason that what is going into our hearts are sinful, evil things. We have to change the input to get a different output. This is why God’s word instructs us in Philippians 4:8 to meditate on all things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, everything of good report, of any virtue, and that are praiseworthy. We can’t expect our words to glorify and please the Lord if what we are exposing our hearts to isn’t glorifying and pleasing to Him as well. This kind of meditation on all things good is not an easy task. The world can very easily fill our hearts with all kinds of nasty, rotten things that displease the Lord if we don’t pay attention. That’s why we are admonished as followers of Christ to be set apart, to be in the world and not of the world. Sometimes this requires a lifestyle change. Maybe it means you need to find a different job, or a new circle of friends, or give up a certain television show or listen to more uplifting music. The point is, if it’s not pleasing to the Lord, then we shouldn’t be focusing our thoughts on it. Instead, we should seek out ways to fill our time with things that are glorifying to the Lord, like studying the Word, earnestly praying at His feet, fellowshipping with other believers, and ministering wherever God has placed you. Only when our hearts are full of God’s good treasure will our tongues follow suit.

​I encourage you, dear sister, to really examine the way you have been using your words. Are they uplifting and glorifying to the Lord? Or are they a symptom of a larger heart problem? If you see any area that needs work – as I know I have – please don’t get discouraged. Remember that we have all fallen short, repent of your sinful speech, and seek out the grace God so willingly provides. Then ask Him to examine your heart, removing any evil treasure, and show you how to fill it with His good treasure instead. I pray that you will leave those sinful, impulsive lips behind and embrace the words of Psalm 35:28: “And my tongue shall speak of Your righteousness, and Your praise all the day long.”

​With much love and encouragement,
​~ Lauren Titcomb

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Patience Unto Eternity

My Dearest Sister,

​Let’s be honest with each other: Life is hard and seemingly unfair sometimes. And while I’d like to say that I have mastered the valuable skill of patience in the face of those unavoidable hardships, that would be completely untrue. In fact I think most people, even most Christians, struggle with this particular fruit of the Spirit. It’s not difficult to determine why when we see that patience is defined as “the bearing of provocation, annoyance, misfortune, or pain, without complaint, loss of temper, irritation, or the like.” So basically, being able to handle the complete sum of life’s problems without so much as batting an eyelash. Yeah, I don’t know about you, but I don’t think that’s easy for anyone.

​I have always marveled at how simple yet how elusive the concept of patience seems to be. After all, if God calls us to practice it, then surely it should be something that we are capable of doing on a regular basis. I think, however, that the majority of our inability to have true biblical patience lies in the fact that the world and God have two very different ideas about it. It’s another one of those classic sin-versus-righteousness-scenarios that all too often plays itself out in our daily lives. You see, the world teaches us that everything revolves around the here and now. To be truly happy, we have to put ourselves first, doing whatever pleases our fancy because it’s all about enjoying this life to the fullest. Why else do you think that the entire nation owes over 11 trillion dollars in credit card debt? Because they have to have what they want, NOW! Patience simply has no place in the humanistic – and by extension materialistic – lifestyle.

​God’s idea, on the other hand, is quite different. As Christians, we know that this life is temporary, gone in the blink of an eye, and that there is a greater, eternal life to come. Hebrews 6:11-12 speaks about the attitude we are to have toward this life: “And we desire that each one of you show the same diligence to the full assurance of hope until the end, that you do not become sluggish, but imitate those who through faith and patience inherit the promises.” The world doesn’t have a promise for anyone’s future; All it can guarantee is the here and now. God, however, has given “exceedingly great and precious promises” to those He calls His children (2 Peter 1:4). If you’re unfamiliar with them, just read the Book of Revelation for starters. There is something better at the end of this life and so we are content to have patience, even if it means suffering through hardships and trials along the way.

​James 5:10-11 gives us an example of this patience through earthly sorrows: “My brethren, take the prophets, who spoke in the name of the Lord, as an example of suffering and patience. Indeed we count them blessed who endure. You have heard of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord – that the Lord is very compassionate and merciful.” Many of the prophets of God were tortured and brutally killed for speaking in His name, yet not for one second did they stop persevering down the path to which God had called them. They knew the end the Lord had intended for them, one full of compassion and mercy. It is because of their unshakeable faith in this promise, that they were able to have patience, even in the midst of their suffering. Job, on the other hand, had everything stripped from him but his life and still he faithfully served the Lord. It was because of his faith and patience that he was rewarded in the end with even more prosperity than he had before.

​Now thankfully, most of us do not face the daily horror of being physically persecuted for our faith or losing our homes, family, and health in one fell swoop. But even if we did, we can be sure that all of our suffering has first passed through our Father’s hands. As Proverbs 20:24 says “A man’s steps are of the Lord; How then can a man understand his own way?” It’s easy to feel like God has abandoned us when we are in the midst of earthly struggles and life has not turned out as we planned. Often times the last thing we want to do is have patience for this glorious end that feels so very far away from the here and now. But sister, let me assure you that God has planned every step of the journey. While there will be times when we will suffer more than we ever thought possible, we do not need to fear or doubt, for His promise to the prophets is the same as His promise to you and I: He has an end in mind that is for our good and His glory, one where He can finally pour out His full compassion and mercy on our souls. Have patience for that end dear sister, no matter what struggles we face in the meantime. We can’t afford to become short-sighted and lost in the sorrows of this life, not when we know the glory that awaits us in eternity.
​As I finish this letter, I am reminded of a hymn I learned as a child and it seems fitting to close with it here:

​“It will be worth it all, when we see Jesus.
​Life’s trials will seem so small, when we see Christ.
​One glimpse of His dear face, all sorrows will erase.
​So bravely run the race till we see Christ.”

​Remember the promises of God about your glorious future, my dearest sister, for they will give you the patience to endure even the toughest of life’s hardships.
​
​Your dear friend and sister in Christ,
​~ Lauren

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The Bondage and Blindness of Fear

 

My Dearest Sister,

 

Do you remember learning to swim when you were a kid? You learned in the shallow end first, trying to figure out how to coordinate kicking and paddling with keeping your head above water. A parent was probably right there with you, holding you up and cheering you on. Once you had the shallow end figured out though, it came time to move on to the deep end. For me, I remember standing at the edge of the pool, looking into the deep water just beyond my toes and being terrified I would just sink right to the bottom. My dad was in the water, holding out his arms, encouraging me to jump. He assured me he would be right there to keep me safe. But still, I was afraid. I wanted to leap right in and prove that I could swim but I just couldn’t force myself to move. Fear of not being able to swim had petrified me. Eventually I did jump and my dad caught me like he promised. However, I distinctly remember that crippling feeling of fear that had caused me to doubt, both in my ability to swim and my dad’s ability to protect me.

Fears, even our silly childhood ones, are powerful aren’t they? They makes us feel weak and helpless. When allowed to run rampant, our fears become a form of bondage. They can even hinder our faith. You see, when we give in to fear, it keeps us from living life like we serve a sovereign God who has our good in mind. That is why fear is one of the devil’s favorite weapons against us, because it works so well at bringing us down and making us forget just how powerful our God really is. The good news is, we don’t have to believe these lies from the enemy. We can break free from the captivity of our fears by first remembering the truth of God’s word. Romans 8:15 says “For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out ‘Abba, Father’.” Because of God’s marvelous grace in sending His Son to pay the price for our sins, He set us free from this bondage of fear by adopting us into His family. The word “Abba” here is a more intimate name for one’s father, like “Daddy” or “Papa”. To Him, we are not just some non-related adopted kid; we are His beloved children and He is our wonderful Daddy! And like a child who is afraid, all we have to do is cry out to our Father, our loving Papa, and He will come to our aid. Hebrews 13:5b-6 assures us of this as well: “For He Himself has said, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you.’ So we may boldly say ‘The Lord is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?” Unlike some earthly fathers, God will never walk out on His children. He will always be there to help us, not matter what we are up against.

One of my favorite stories about overcoming fear comes from 2 Kings 6:8-23. Here it is in a nutshell: The king of Syria was angry at Elisha for revealing the secret location of his army to Israel, so he sent a great army to the city where Elisha was staying. When Elisha’s servant woke up in the morning and saw this massive army with all their horses and chariots surrounding the city, he was terrified (I don’t blame him!). He runs to Elisha and says “Master! What are we going to do?” And I can imagine Elisha sitting there, maybe eating a bit of breakfast, and as calm as can be assures his servant that everything is going to be okay. He says in verse 16, “Do not fear, for those who are with us are more than those who are with them.” The passage goes on to say that “Elisha prayed, and said ‘Lord, I pray, open his eyes that he may see.’ Then the Lord opened the eyes of the young man, and he saw. And behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha.” Wow! I love how amazingly powerful that story is! Elisha knew all along that God would protect him, never leaving or forsaking him. He knew the Lord intimately as his helper, his Abba Father, and so he had no need to fear, even when an entire army was against him.

Even though Elisha’s servant had probably seen some pretty amazing things in his time with this prophet of God, his first response to a daunting situation was driven by fear. He was so worried about the situation at hand that he forgot how powerful his master’s Lord was. When I am afraid I admit that I feel a lot like Elisha’s servant. My human weakness wants to focus on the source of my fear and doubt sets in. I become bound by it and panic like Elisha’s servant did. Even though I know God is powerful, my fear keeps me from being able to see it. So overcoming fear is not just about knowing God promises to never forsake us; It’s about looking past what we are afraid of so we can see that He has been there with us all along. I don’t want to be like Elisha’s servant and be blinded by my fears. I want to be like Elisha and be able to see God’s presence so clearly in my life, that there isn’t even a chance for me to feel afraid in the first place. I want to have that same unwavering confidence and faith that my Father is with me wherever I go, through whatever danger or struggle I face.

Beloved sister, if you are crippled by fear in your life and can’t see the army of protection God has around you, just cry out to Him like Elisha did for his servant. Cry out “Abba, Father!” and ask Him to open your eyes to see the truth of His protection and power. Ask Him to change your perspective to see things not with blinded human eyes, but through a spiritual lens where God’s presence is evident. As children of God, we shouldn’t live under the bondage of fear. Instead, we should embrace the freedom that our Father has provided for us, so that we may boldly declare “The Lord is my helper! I will fear no more!” We should be able to stand like a little child at the deep end of a pool and jump without a second thought, knowing that our Daddy – our beloved Abba – is there with outstretched arms waiting to catch us.

 

Your Unafraid Sister in Christ,

~ Lauren

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The Anger Problem

“He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.” – Proverbs 16:32

My Dearest Sister,

I want you to think back to the last time someone wronged you. Maybe it was a mistake and they apologized immediately afterward. Even worse, maybe they did it on purpose as an attack. Or maybe they never even knew how their words or actions affected you. The point is, we’ve all been there. Someone sins against us, whether deliberately or not, and we are left in a tangle of emotions. I’m not sure about you, but I know for me, my initial response is to be angry with them. Sometimes it feels like something I can’t even control, just a split-second emotional reaction. Sometimes I will verbalize this anger, either to the person who hurt me, or in venting to someone about them; but most of the time I have a tendency to say nothing and just silently hold that anger against them. Neither of these, of course, is an ideal response. The first only makes the situation worse; “A harsh word stirs up anger,” remember (see Proverbs 15:1)? The second is the perfect setup for bitterness and an unforgiving spirit, which can actually hinder our own walk with God (Matthew 6:14-15; Isaiah 59:2). So what then, should our response be when confronted with our own feelings of anger toward someone?

Before I answer that question, I want to back up and explore the nature of anger for just a minute. First off, nowhere in scripture do we find that anger in and of itself is a bad thing. For there is such a thing as righteous anger, like when God was angry at the Israelites for their disobedience in the wilderness. So if anger is not necessarily wrong, why are we as followers of Christ so cautioned against it? Because, my sister, anger opens the door to a multitude of other sins. Remember the words of Ephesians 4:26-27: “’Be angry and do not sin’: do not let the sun go down upon your wrath, nor give place to the devil.” Left unchecked, anger can actually provide a foothold in your life to Satan. You see, anger is the driving force behind so many sinful thoughts and actions; things such as covetousness, adultery, un-submissiveness, taking the Lord’s name in vain, dishonoring our parents, and a judgmental spirit can all stem from an anger problem. In Matthew 5:21-22, Jesus even tells us that being unjustly angry at someone is just as bad as murdering them. Yikes! In short, anger can have serious consequences and is not something to be taken lightly.

That still leaves us with a delimma though. As humans, we are emotional beings. God made us as such and it is in His image that He did so, for we know from scripture that God has emotions, too. He can be angry, joyful, grieved, pleased, jealous, and compassionate. It’s no wonder He understands us so well! Now, emotions are not a bad thing either. Many times they help us do wonderful things, like care for those around us and show Christ’s love. The problem happens when we try to live by those emotions. Emotions can be very unstable and doing something based solely on what we’re feeling, not necessarily on what is right, gets us into trouble sometimes. And because our emotions are so hard-wired into us, ‘ruling our spirits’ is not an easy task by any means. That is why someone who does is better than a mighty conqueror.

So what do we do then, when we are confronted with our own anger? If we can’t unleash it on anyone else and we can’t keep it to ourselves to hold until later, where do we put it? Ephesians 4:31-32 provides an answer: “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil-speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” We are called to put it far, far away from us and instead be kind and forgiving to the person who wronged us, even if they don’t deserve it. For how can we honestly stay angry at someone when God, who has every right to be angry at us for all of the foolish, sinful things we do, doesn’t hold it against us? He has turned His anger away from us so many times that we can’t even keep track. He could so easily have destroyed the whole world because of its sin against Him, yet in His compassion and lovingkindness He didn’t. He chose instead to save them from eternal damnation. In comparison, what little is really asked of us?

My dear friend, if you are struggling today with your own anger toward someone, I want to encourage you to give it up to God right now. I know what you may be thinking: it hurts to let it go. You want to hold on to it so tightly because if you don’t, then it’s like they are getting away with whatever they did to you. I promise you that is not the case. Everyone will eventually be judged for their own sins and the Lord will avenge His own. It may also be hard to let it go because sometimes it’s humiliating. It feels like you are letting someone walk all over you. To be honest, putting anger away from you does require a bit of humility. We have to let go of our pride and do what we know is right. But I also promise you, that kind of self-control will not go unseen or unrewarded.

It’s definitely not easy, otherwise it wouldn’t be such an issue for us, but my challenge to you, and to myself as well, is this: Will we be weak and let our anger control what we do? Or will we be better than mighty conquerors and rule over our anger, putting it away from us? One choice is easy and the other is hard, but it is nevertheless, ours to make.

Your Emotional Sister in Christ,
– Lauren Titcomb

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Be of Good Cheer

My Dearest Sister,

​I love it when God tells us exactly what we need to hear exactly when we need to hear it. Whether it’s through your daily Bible reading, in your prayer time, a teaching at church, or through the subtle words of a dear friend, He has such a marvelous way of reminding us about His truths. This very thing happened to me during the most recent Sunday morning service at our church. Let me start by telling you that the week prior hadn’t exactly been fantastic. I had been dealing with the worst week of my vet assistant internship so far (lots of catty technicians, gossips, and bad attitudes); the headache of trying to get the paperwork for an out-of-state car registration sorted out before my current registration expires; trying to find a new dog sitter for my upcoming trip because the one I had cancelled on me; and on top of all of that I decided to get emotional about the fact that my husband is leaving in a few days for four weeks of Army training. For some reason, the stress of the week was just really getting to me. I started thinking “If I can’t handle these little struggles, how on earth am I going to handle a nine month deployment, a cross-country move, and the last year of my Bachelor’s degree, all of which are only just around the corner?”. I could feel these difficult events staring me in the face and for the first time in a long time I began to feel afraid of what the future held.

​When we walked into church Sunday morning, all of these things were on my mind. I was so distracted that I barely paid attention to the songs we sang or the announcements that were given. All I could focus on was this gnawing feeling in my gut that things were about to get a lot harder and I was not going to like it. And then the pastor started his lesson in Matthew, Chapter 14. You know, the one where Jesus walks on water? It’s verses 22-33 and I encourage you to go read it when you are finished reading this letter. Maybe it will speak to you as much as it did to me. Anyway, at first I wasn’t paying much attention to the teaching, but then slowly God started working on my heart. By the time he got to the part where Peter walks out on the water toward Jesus, I was transfixed. He was talking about how as long as Peter kept his eyes on the Lord, he could stay above the water. It was only when he started focusing on the storm around him that he became afraid and began to sink. When the lesson was over, I was in a little bit of a shock. It was like God took one of His truths and wham! Hit me with it right between the eyes. He’s so amazing in His timing, isn’t He?

​Sitting in that service, I totally felt like Peter. For the past couple years life has been going pretty smoothly for us, all things considered. It’s easy to have faith and focus on the goodness of the Lord when things are going smoothly. It’s when the storms of life come, when the waves start to crash and the wind starts to howl that we lose our faith and start to focus on our fear instead of on Christ; It’s then that we start to drown in our own troubles. That week I could see some storms brewing in my future and like Peter, I became afraid of them. Instead of looking to Jesus and resting in the promise that He will never leave or forsake me, I had started to sink in the waves of my own fear.
​God never said we have smooth sailing our whole lives, that no difficult or stressful or painful thing would ever happen to us. In fact, quite the contrary. One of my favorite scriptures is Jesus’ words of hope to his followers in John 16:33 – “In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” Be of good cheer simply means “have courage”. So even though we know that life will get hard, even unbearable sometimes, we can have courage because we know that Christ is greater than any trial or heartache that comes our way; He has already won the eternal victory for us, and yet he is also there to lead us through any storm that arises while we walk this earth. All we have to do is stay focused on Him instead of the storm.

​My favorite part about this story is the ending. You see, even though Peter faltered and let his fear take over, as soon as he called out for the Lord to save him, Jesus was immediately there with an outstretched hand to pull him out of the crashing waves. Not only that, as soon as they got into the boat Jesus calmed the storm. Our Lord not only loves us enough to save us when we cry out for help, He also has the power to make the entire storm disappear. Now that’s a mighty God! If we can rest in this truth alone, what reason do we even have to be afraid in the first place? We should have nothing but courage in this life because He is our almighty God and He loves us.

​I am so thankful that God spoke to me in such a powerful way this week. Even though I can still see those same storms just on the horizon, I am not afraid any more. I know that I can have courage because Christ is my Lord and Savior and He is greater than any trouble that comes my way; I know that if I stay focused on Him, the waves and wind will not overtake me. And even if I should falter, I know that if I cry out to Him, He will be there in an instant to save me. He loves us so much my dear sister, and this is His promise to us. So be of good cheer, for He is greater than any storm we will ever encounter!

​Your Courageous Sister in Christ,
​~ Lauren