Author: Lauren Titcomb

Posted on

I Shall Yet Praise Him…

My Dearest Sister,

You know those days where you wish you could just start over? Well, it’s been one of those days. I’ll spare you the gritty details, but let’s just say it involved a stressed husband, a screaming baby, and a long list of errands to run with said screaming baby. The headache I woke up with got worse as the day wore on and our apartment seemed to get messier before my eyes. The last thing I felt like doing in the midst of my frustration and tiredness was praising the Lord. Yet as I reflect back on my day, the words of Psalm 43:5 come to mind: “Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him, the help of my countenance and my God.”

As my life seems to get busier and full of more responsibilities, I am learning that just because I am stressed or burdened, praising the Lord should still be a priority. In fact, it happens to be the very purpose for which we were intended. Psalm 148 tells us that all creation from the heights of the heavens to the depths of the sea are designed to praise God. Remember the story where Jesus was entering Jerusalem riding on the donkey? He told the disgruntled Pharisees that if His disciples were to stop proclaiming Him as Lord and King, the rocks would immediately cry out His praises. If the stones of the earth are intended to worship God, then how much more the man who was made in His own image?

It is important to remember sister, that not only were we created to proclaim God’s praises, but we do so because He is worthy of them. As Psalm 145:3 says “Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; His greatness no one can fathom.” It goes on to list all the many reasons why He deserves our praise, from the wonderful works He has done among us (vs. 4-6), to His unfailing goodness, grace, and compassion (vs. 7-9). The Lord is mighty (v. 11), He keeps his promises (v. 13), and He lifts up those who fall (v. 14). Our magnificent Father provides for us (v. 15), is righteous and loving in all His ways (v. 17), and watches over and protects us (v. 20).

Of all these reasons to proclaim God’s greatness, let’s not forget the one that allows us to know Him in the first place: “In Him you also trusted, after you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation; in whom also, having believed, you were sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise, who is the guarantee of our inheritance until the redemption of the purchased possession, to the praise of His glory” (Ephesians 1:13-14). When sin entered the world through the fall of man, it became a barrier between us and our most perfect Creator. However, in His infinite wisdom, God provided a way for us to be united with Him once again. By sending His precious, sinless Son to take the consequences of our iniquity, He provided a way of salvation from spiritual death and an eternity separated from Him. What could be more deserving of our endless praise than that?

If my attitude had been one of praise today, even though my soul felt cast down, my day would have turned out very differently. Times of frustration would have been opportunities to grow. My son’s inconsolable crying would have been a time to show compassion and love, just like the compassion and love God has shown me. The long list of things to do would have been a chance to thank Him for the family He has given me to clean up after and care for. Praising God through each and every hiccup of my day would have turned my focus from myself and my problems to Him and His glory. And that’s the whole point of praise, really. It’s turning our attention to the One who has created us in His wisdom, redeemed us in His love, and sustains us in His strength. For that, He is most worthy of our praise each and every day, from now until eternity.

“I will exalt you, my God the King; I will praise your name for ever and ever. Every day I will praise you and extol your name forever and ever. Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom.” – Psalm 145:1-3

In His love, ~ Lauren

Posted on

Broken Hearts

My Dearest Sister,

When I was growing up, my parents were pretty cautious about what we watched on television. Most of the time we ended up watching reruns of older shows because they tended to be more family friendly. One of the programs we watched regularly was Happy Days. If you are familiar with the show, then you no doubt are familiar with the lovable character of Fonzie. You know that episode where he can’t even say the words “I was wrong”, as if they are physically going to hurt him? Yeah, that’s totally me (my poor husband can attest to this). I guess pride is just part of our human nature and with that comes the desire to be right, but that desire has so stubbornly manifested itself in me that admitting when I have been wrong is a real struggle sometimes; it can be so difficult that the words feel almost painful to say. Because of this, I don’t like to admit when I am at fault very often. As you can imagine, this can get me into trouble sometimes (again, my poor husband can attest to this).

You know who didn’t struggle to admit he was wrong? King David. If anyone could be more predisposed to issues of pride, it would be the shepherd boy who took down a giant with a single stone, became king over an entire nation, conquered thousands of men in battle, and would eventually become the forefather of the Savior of the world. Yet as great as all of his accomplishments were, David still recognized that his heart was deeply rooted in sin and he was desperately in need of forgiveness. Psalm 51 in particular outlines his prayer of repentance after his adulterous affair with Bathsheba and the murder of her husband, Uriah.

The first thing David does is acknowledge the source of his bad behavior, his own sinful heart. “Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity. And in sin my mother conceived me,” he says (v. 5). David knew that he was born into sin the same way he was born into his family. It’s hard to imagine that my sweet baby boy who is sleeping peacefully in the other room shares this same inherent state of iniquity. He seems so pure right now, so incapable of anything evil. However, I know the day will quickly come when that veil of innocence will be lifted, revealing the same sinful nature we all possess.

But there is good news: thanks to Jesus’ death on the cross, this nature no longer controls us who belong to Christ. We have been set free from sin and are no longer slaves to it (Romans 6:22-23). However, that doesn’t mean that our sin nature just goes away completely. Sometimes it comes creeping back up on us and pounces when we least expect it. David was hand-picked by God to lead His people and yet he still struggled with sinful thoughts and actions. However, he knew that when he had sinned against the Lord that there was only one appropriate response: “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me” (Psalm 51:10). He was desperately in need of forgiveness and God was the only One who could wash his heart clean again.

You see, what God desires from us more than anything else is a heart that is right before Him. That’s the whole reason He sent His Son to this earth in the first place, so that our sins could be forgiven and our hearts could be washed clean! David was more than willing to admit to his sins because he knew that conviction (identification) of sin is the first step to a heart that is right with God. “For You do not desire sacrifice, or else I would give it; You do not delight in burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, a broken and contrite heart. These, O God, You will not despise” (v.16-17). David was a mighty man who did many great things in his lifetime, but his greatest strength was something many would consider a weakness: a humble, broken heart. He knew that he was born a sinner in need of forgiveness and he didn’t let his pride get in the way of admitting that. Being right with God was more important to him than being right.

Sister, if you are anything like me then you know how hard it can be to admit to wrongdoing, especially when our human nature dictates that being right is more important. However, before our hearts can be made clean, they must first be broken. I can’t begin to tell you how convicting writing this letter was for me. It has caused me to look on my prideful heart with shame and sorrow. But do you know what? That conviction is the first step to having a heart that is right before God. We can’t shy away from that brokenness, sister; we must embrace it as King David did, knowing it only draws us closer to the One who makes all things – including our filthy, sinful hearts – new once more.

In His Love,
~ Lauren

Posted on

Reflections

My Dearest Sister,

I have a confession to make: I am a recovering perfectionist. My desire to be the absolute best I could be used to have a great hold on me and nowhere was it more evident than in my school work. I’ve always loved learning, but at some point in my college experience an obsession with being a straight-A student took over. I absolutely had to do well in school; There was no alternative. I was so determined to be the perfect student that I would spend hours upon hours studying and doing research for papers, always making sure I was impressing my teachers with what I could accomplish. Most of the time I succeeded, until one fateful poetry class broke my long-running streak. I had completed the mountains of exercises and writing assignments with as much effort as I could muster yet still only received a B.

It may not seem like a big deal to some people, but I was very disappointed at the time. Just like that, my record as a perfect student was tarnished and there was nothing I could do about it. I tried to justify it with excuses, like the teacher had expected too much of us or the grading scale hadn’t been fair, but the truth is I just wasn’t a very good poet. In short, I was not perfect. This was a hard truth to accept because back then, if I looked in a mirror I didn’t just see myself; I saw a good student who was smart and always got A’s. It wasn’t until that perfect image of myself was shattered, that I realized just how much of my identity it had become.

Today when I look in a mirror, there are a host of new images to contend with: perfect wife, loving mother, crafty homemaker, good cook, helpful friend, and talented writer, just to name a few. There is a lot of pressure these days to be perfect, and the route of stay at home mom is no exception. There’s always something to improve, something at which to try harder. Sometimes it just feels like too much to handle. And do you know what? It is. You see, sister, the world has deeply and tragically lied to us. It’s told us that having a good image is a necessity for happiness. What we fail to realize is that this way of thinking is as old as sin itself. What is dwelling on one’s own importance other than the same wickedness that led Adam and Eve to eat of the forbidden fruit so they could be like God?

The truth is, our identity is not the one that matters. As the apostle Paul said in Galatians 2:20: “I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.” Beloved, this should be our heart’s cry! Once we become new creatures in Christ, our lives are no longer ours alone. We become a living vessel for Christ and no matter where we go or what we do, we represent Him. This means that instead of striving to be a perfect student, we should be a student who loves Christ. Instead of trying to be the best wife in the world we should be a wife who loves Christ. The same goes for our role as a mother, a daughter, an employee, a homemaker, or whatever other roles God has given us. And do you know, it’s ironic what happens next. When we put Christ first in our lives, we are more equipped to handle those roles than we ever were on our own.

2 Corinthians 3:18 sums it all up pretty well: “But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as if in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.” When I look in a mirror, I want to see a woman who loves Christ, nothing else. I don’t have to be the perfect wife or mom or writer or friend, because not only is trying to maintain a perfect image exhausting, it does nothing to add to the kingdom of God. Rather, it takes away from it by turning the focus to me. The only way to turn the focus back to Him is by living my life in a way that reflects His glory, not my own.

So, sister, I have one question left for you: Who do you see when you look in the mirror?

In His Love,
~ Lauren

Posted on

The Greatest Gift

My Dearest Sister,

It all starts the day after Thanksgiving. Department stores are flooded with shoppers, television commercials spout the latest holiday sales, and wrapping paper is sold by the thousands of yards. It’s the season of giving and even the best of us can get caught up in the mad rush to find the perfect gift for our loved ones. All too often though, we forget the very first and greatest gift ever given. It was over two thousand years ago that God sent His Son to this world in the form of little babe born in a stable in Bethlehem. In doing so, He made a way for us to become a part of His family, adopting us as His very own children.

The apostle Paul tells us more about this gift of adoption in Romans 8:15: “For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, ‘Abba, Father.’ The Spirit himself bears witness with our Spirit that we are children of God, and if children then heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him that we may also be glorified together.” To fully understand the magnitude of this adoption process, we have to consider the audience to whom Paul is writing, the Romans. In order to adopt a son in Ancient Rome, the adoptive father had to buy him three times from the biological father, selling him back again after each time. After the son was sold to the adopting party for the third time, the biological father could claim him no longer. The son was then considered to be in the family of the adoptive father and had the same inheritance rights as one of his natural-born children. However, unlike a natural-born son, he could never be disowned by his adoptive father; the adoption was permanent.

Usually these adoptions happened when a person of great wealth or influence needed a son to carry on their family name and heritage. For example, Caesar Augustus was adopted by his own uncle, Julius Caesar, who had no children of his own. As a result, Julius was able to carry on his lineage and Augustus inherited an incredible position of power. It was a win-win. Because of this custom, it was virtually unheard of to adopt a slave. After all, the adoptive father needed someone worthy of carrying on his legacy, not some poor, dirty wretch who wouldn’t know the first thing about being the inheritor of a wealthy estate or important position. Yet we know from scripture that we were indeed once slaves to sin, following the desires and whims of our flesh. What, then, does God have to gain from adopting us as slaves of sin into His powerful family? What do we have to offer Him that makes us worthy of His affection? The answer is absolutely nothing. That’s what makes His desire to adopt us so amazing!

You see, God already had a Son to carry on His legacy and inherit all of His riches and glory: His name was Jesus Christ and He was perfect in every way, the apple of His Father’s eye. And yet God chose to send Him to this world in the form of a little baby boy, so that He would grow up to be persecuted, mocked, and killed by the very people He came to save. Do you understand what a sacrifice that was? Jesus took the blame that was not His and God, not being able to look on sin, had to forsake His precious only Son on the cross. And for what? For us, sister! Just as a Roman father had to buy his adopted son three times, God bought us with three days and nights of Jesus’ death.

There is only one thing that could explain such an amazing sacrifice: “Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God” (1 John 1:3). LOVE, dear sister. God cared about us – poor, wretched slaves to sin as we were – enough to purchase our adoption with His own Son’s blood. And not only that, He made us equal inheritors with Christ. I ask you, what greater love can there be than that? So this season, let’s take a break from all the last minute shopping and present-wrapping to appreciate the greatest gift we will ever receive – our adoption as sons and daughters in the family of our ever-loving Abba Father. Merry Christmas, my precious sister!

In His love,
~ Lauren

Posted on

A Blessing In Disguise

My Dearest Sister,

​When we think of loneliness, usually our immediate response is that it is negative. We usually cite Genesis 2:18 or Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 and say that God did not intend for us to be alone. While it is true that God created us as social beings who are designed to function better together rather than by ourselves, the truth is you can still feel lonely without actually being alone. Have you ever been surrounded by people, even those who you know love and care about you, and yet still feel that heavy void overwhelm you? I certainly have. As a military wife, loneliness is just sort of a regular occurrence. Every time I say goodbye to my husband, even if it is just for a short training exercise, I feel that weighty, gaping void settle in my chest. Yes, it certainly helps to surround myself with other believers who can uplift and encourage me, but I still struggle with feelings of loneliness nonetheless. I can only imagine how my fellow military sisters who are facing their third, fourth, or even fifth deployment feel. The truth is God never said that loneliness would be absent from our lives. In fact, sometimes it can even be a blessing in disguise.

​My first personal experience with that overwhelmingly deep loneliness came when Isaac joined the Army several years ago. We had been married less than a year and the program he was in required a total training time of four months, a daunting hurdle to a newlywed who had never been apart from her husband. I reassured myself that I was strong and could handle the separation, however when he finally departed nothing could prepare me for the ensuing loneliness that would consume me day and night. Even though I moved in with family during that time I still felt very alone. I constantly battled against the deep ache of missing my closest companion, longing for something more than the five minute phone calls every few weeks. Finally, in complete desperation I cried out to God, pouring out my pain at His feet, and asking Him to fill that deep loneliness that was eating away at my spirit. I began studying the Bible every morning, praying to Him, and just spending time fellowshipping with my heavenly Father.

​And do you know what happened? I noticed an immediate change in my ability to cope with missing my husband. I still felt the pangs of loneliness but they weren’t nearly as strong as before. You see, I hadn’t realized just how much I had been neglecting my relationship with God; Sadly, other things had become more important to me than spending some one-on-one time with the Lord of my life. Because God is immensely powerful and holy, I think it became easy for me to forget that He is also our intimate friend and companion. He wants us to depend on Him for guidance, turn to Him for reassurance, and cry out to Him for comfort. Sometimes that deep aching void we call loneliness is simply a sign that we need to pursue the Lord first, above all of our other relationships. Not only will doing so strengthen our faith and our testimony but sister, it is the only way we will find lasting comfort and peace. Strong marriages, faithful friends, and a loving churches are great to have and we should definitely pursue them, but nothing can replace that constant kinship that we find in our Lord’s presence.

​I know that sooner or later Isaac will probably get his orders for deployment. And while the thought of the immense loneliness that comes with it used to terrify me, I now know that it will be a remarkable opportunity to lean even more on my heavenly Father, to become even stronger in my faith. I cannot fathom the depths of loneliness that have been felt by some of my fellow military wives who have been through multiple deployments or even lost their husbands in combat, but I do know one thing: they are some of the strongest, most God-loving women I have ever known. So don’t despair if you are facing a season of loneliness in your life, my sister. Instead, seize that ache in your heart as an opportunity to grow closer to your heavenly Father. Not only is He the only One who can completely fill that void, but His is also the most important relationship you will ever pursue.

​“Nevertheless I am continually with You; You hold me by my right hand. You will guide me with Your wise counsel, and afterward receive me to glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is none upon the earth that I desire besides You. My flesh and my heart fail; But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”​- Psalm 73: 23-26

In His Love,

Lauren
​