Author: Kayla Mahnken

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Leaning Into Hope

Dear sister,

Have you noticed that when we talk about suffering we often talk about when a family member gets cancer, we ourselves get sick, or a loved one passes away? I’m not discounting the pain and struggle that comes in these difficult times but what sticks out to me is that these things are outside of our control.

What about the disappointments and shattered dreams we bring on ourselves? I don’t hear anyone talking about those. When I look at my own life and look at the lives of those around me, I feel alienated and alone. Does it ever seem to you, dear sister, like everyone else has life figured out? Do you ever feel like you’re the only one struggling?

I do. That’s why I want to take a moment to shine a light on our depravity. I want to consider Eve, who was the first person to disobey God; David, who committed adultery with his best friend’s wife and then had him killed in battle to cover it up; and Peter, who willfully denied the Lord Jesus in His hour of greatest need. I want to hear their stories. I want to know that I’m not alone. Don’t you?

Some time ago I was in a relationship with a really great guy. He really liked me and wanted to be with me. I liked him as well but was experiencing some doubt and fear. Long story short, a little bit of doubt and fear turned into a lot of doubt and fear and I ended up going down a destructive path and breaking things off with him.

Months later, it suddenly clicked; our future together was as clear as if it had already happened. Shattered, broken, and empty, I ran to God in my distress, giving him the pieces of my broken heart and there he revealed the sins, idols, and wrong beliefs that had been guiding my decisions for a long time.

I was angry with myself for messing up and angry with God for letting it happen. Yet I heard him calling: “Are you willing to go with me? Come, follow me.” I could see where he was taking me; it was dark, scary, and far away from the things I wanted. I did NOT want to go with Him. But after some kicking and screaming I finally surrendered to the work God was doing in my heart.

Let’s fast forward to where God and I, through counseling, mentorship, reading the Word, and prayer, began to identify my idolatry and my enslavement to the approval of others. Then God the Holy Spirit unraveled the lies that had caused me to break my own heart. He also revealed deep hurts that had never healed, and brought reconciliation to broken relationships. Finally, with this new knowledge of the truth, I was able to discard the lies I had been believing.

Even though I still have moments of regret, I am learning to lean into the hope and healing the Lord has brought about through my brokenness, that God is the Always Good Father and that this hardship was necessary for my own salvation and the situation that ultimately will bring Jesus the greatest glory.

Sis, if you have fallen into a snare, please know that you are not alone. It may look like everyone else has it all together, but they don’t. We are all sinners and we all have struggles. Remember that God holds your life and in Christ there is no condemnation but only forgiveness, mercy and grace. Take courage, dear sister, and be strong in the Lord. Whatever you’ve done, it is not beyond redeeming. Whatever you’ve done, it is not the end. God is an expert in redemption and making old things new. You can trust Him.

Fighting with you,

Kayla

And I will lead the blind in a way that they do not know, in paths they have not known I will guide them. I will turn the darkness before them into light, the rough places into level ground.  These are the things I do, and I do not forsake them.

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To Value The Honorable

Dear sister,

Do we understand what it means to honor someone? Do we understand what it means to honor Jesus? Why do we honor people? What does the word “honor” even mean? (Remember, sis, I’m the word nerd.)

To honor someone simply means to ascribe value to him or her. It is the showing of respect to someone who has earned it. We honor our soldiers with medals; actors and musicians with Oscars and Grammys; athletes with trophies; etc. Through the giving and receiving of these awards we are saying “Your accomplishment is worthy of recognition.”

But how do we as people and as believers honor Jesus? What do you give to the Son of God who already reigns over everything? The Bible tells us that Jesus has already been honored by His Father, sitting at the right hand of God (Acts 2:34). God has also promised to make His enemies His footstool. So Christ has been and will be exalted by God.

For us, honoring Jesus is going to look a little different. We can’t exactly give Jesus all authority in heaven and in earth after all. Here’s a list I put together of some specific ways I am personally trying to honor Jesus. This list is not an exhaustive one but one that can help us to jump start our call to honor Jesus. Will you join me?

1. Obey Him.

Oh this can be a tough one for me sometimes, dear sister. Let’s face it. Life gets hard. One day you’re pumped because you know you’re exactly where the Lord wants you and the next you’re asking God if you made the right decision because you’ve hit a rough patch. It’s in these moments that we need to seek to do what God is calling us to even if we don’t want to do it.

 2. Spend your time wisely.

Yikes! When I look back on my past I’m depressed by the amount of time I have frivolously wasted away. Whether it was binging on my favorite TV shows (thank you, Netflix), or simply not doing what I should have been doing, the way I was spending my time was not indicative of a Christ-centered life. As the Lord convicted me of this I started to make changes in my life that allowed me to spend my time wisely. I canceled my subscription to Netflix, took a social media hiatus, and instead I try to spend more time practicing the harp, and building relationships with those around me. What are some negative time suckers you can give up and what positive things can you replace them with?

3. Give generously.

This may be an obvious one to many of us but it shouldn’t go without mention. In the Old Testament, God required the Israelites to offer up ten percent of their goods/income to the tabernacle. In the New Testament it is left up to us to decide how much we will give. Whatever the amount give regularly and with a joyful heart (2 Corinthians 9:7).

You may also consider giving your money (and/or your time) to an organization you care about that is devoted to helping others who are in a time of crisis.

 4. Value what Jesus values.

Do you know what Jesus values, dear sister? If not, take some time today to read His word and find out. A few things you might find include integrity, a pure heart, faithfulness. Examine your heart and your actions. Is the way you’re living your life marked by the things that Jesus values most? Be honest with yourself and if you don’t like what you find in the trenches of your soul, figure out a way to change it. Seek to be a woman of honor and integrity, who not only gives honor to her Lord and Savior, but is worthy of it.

How will you honor the Lord today?
Running with you,

Kayla

 

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The Variety of Affliction

Dear sister,

Affliction comes to us in many forms. It could be the loss of a loved one, the disappointment of a dream deferred, the ache of homesickness or the heartbreak of unrequited love. The longer we live the more kinds of affliction we experience and I would argue the more intensely we feel it cut into our bones.

Recently, I’ve been experiencing homesickness. More so over the past month than in the last seven months that I’ve been away from my family. Seven months? Has it only been that long? When I moved away for college it was definitely not this hard. But now, working as a young professional, everything feels so permanent.

This ache in my heart has never been so strong or so difficult to ignore. Did I make the right decision? Is this really where God wants me? How can I feel so alone when I’m surrounded by so many people?

During the time I was experiencing this hurt my church began a series on Job and suffering. One point that my pastor made rang particularly true to me. He said “In the midst of suffering we have the tendency to forget the bigger picture and believe that there is nothing greater going on in the world than our suffering,” and “suffering will cause you to doubt God and forget who He is.”

Wow. This was surely true of me. I had allowed my circumstances to cause me to doubt God’s sovereignty and goodness. All I wanted was for Him to tell me why this was happening and just fix everything for me so that I could be happy. But as Job waited for God’s response to his suffering, so I too was left without explanation or resolution.

As the series on Job progressed, I continued to hear more and more truths that I’ll admit I didn’t want to hear. I wanted to hear that it would be OK for me to run back home and “escape” these feelings of loneliness but instead I heard the words of the LORD to Job: “Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth…or who shut in the sea with doors…have you commanded the morning since your days began, and caused the dawn to know its place…have you comprehended the expanse of the earth? Declare, if you know all this” (Job 38:4, 8, 12, 18).

God is pointing out here that Job is out of his depth. He cannot possibly understand fully the ways of God. In chapter 42, Job acknowledges this saying, “Therefore I have uttered what I did not understand, things too wonderful for me, which I did not know.”

The story of Job leads us to this principle: knowing why we are suffering isn’t the solution to it. The better answer than why is Who. Remember in your suffering who God is. Remember His sovereignty and that because of it your pain can never be random or unexpected by God. Remember that He is faithful and will bring you through it.

For me this meant seeing a tiny glimpse of the woman I will be when I reach the end of this time in my life. I saw a woman full of greater faith than when she left home, who knows how to trust God in all circumstances and who has learned the secret to being content. That is, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. In knowing that this specific situation is sanctifying me and bringing me closer to Jesus, I can sincerely rejoice in my momentary afflictions. I know that sounds strange, dear sister, but it happened! It really, truly happened for me and the Lord can do it for you too.

If you are enduring a trial right now, sister, you have a reason to rejoice. Do not cheat yourself from the sanctification that will result by seeking an escape route. But cling to the Lord and his promises. I know it hurts now but God will show you His faithfulness. I guarantee it.

“Count it all joy my brothers when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” –James 1:2-4

You may also want to consider Romans 5:1-5; 8:18-25; and James 5:7-11.

Under His wing,

Kayla

 

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Worthy of Praise

Dear sister,

To be honest, I have no idea where this letter is going. Sometimes I just have to start typing away before I get a clearer picture of what I’m going to write. So in preparation of writing this letter I did a word study on the word “praise.” (You know how I love words.)

The word “praise” comes from the Latin word meaning “price” or “value.” To praise something is simply to ascribe it worth. The International Standard Bible Encyclopedia expands on this definition: “True praise consists in a sincere acknowledgement of a real conviction of worth.”

If we should be convicted that someone or something is of worth, surely God would be at the top of the list. Anything else we may add quickly fades away in comparison with the glory of our God and King, the Creator of the universe. Do you stop to praise God during the day? Do you consider His creation and praise Him for it? Do you meditate on the faithful works He has wrought in your life?

Praising God is not something that I often struggle with. It is but the natural overflow of a heart that meditates on the works and person of God. Just step outside your door and consider the blueness of the sky or the warmth of the sun or the majesty of the trees and immediately you will be filled with awe.

But that’s not to say that there aren’t days when I’m too focused on myself to notice the awesomeness of God’s creation or acknowledge His faithful hand of providence in my life. Sometimes it is hard to praise God when we are in the midst of brokenness and uncertainty.

But when we fail in this duty we rob God of the glory that is due His name and defraud ourselves of the joy that comes from turning our thoughts away from our circumstances and onto our precious Lord Jesus Christ.

I challenge you today, dear sister, that if you are struggling in the valley, if your soul is downcast within you, to take time out to purposefully praise God. Meditate on His goodness and the work of His hands and remember His faithfulness toward you. I assure you, you will find rest for your soul.

Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.

Running with joy,

Kayla

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Eternity In Our Hearts

Dear sister,

This week I started reading Ecclesiastes. It is an odd book. The theme that Solomon seems to be driving home is that everything is meaningless. It doesn’t sound like a particularly biblical message, does it?

Ecclesiastes is about a man who had everything the world had to offer. Solomon even says, “And whatever my eyes desired I did not keep from them. I kept my heart from no pleasure” (2: 9, 10). He had fame, honor, great riches, and every pleasure known to man. Yet, he says, “All is vanity.”

Today we see the heart of man pursuing satisfaction in similar things—fame, fortune, sex and every pleasure imaginable—there is nothing new under the sun (Ecclesiastes 1:9). But Solomon confirms from experience that even all of this does not satisfy the longings of the human heart. Moreover, Solomon seems to be asking, “What is the point of my toil? Why am I working so hard?” He acknowledges that earthly rewards are temporary and our desires are never fully met.

Maybe you’re asking the same question. You think, “I wake up; I go to work; I come home; I eat, drink and sleep; and the next day I do it all over again.” Perhaps you, like me, are looking for meaning in the mundane and purpose in the repetitive. We enjoy the fruits of our labor but not without sometimes making them our idols. We experience pleasure but it never lasts. So what is the point?

The funny thing about the apparent vanity of life is that this is how God made it. Yes, the world we live in is broken and not how God created it to be, but he did establish seven days that would repeat every week, and he established morning and night, a cycle earth would complete daily. He intended for man to work six out of those seven days every week. We are to honor the Sabbath weekly, etc.

So how does Solomon answer our question? In chapter 3 Solomon says, “He [God] has put eternity into man’s heart” (v. 11). We weren’t created for the temporary and fleeting. Our hearts were made for eternity, to live in perfect communion with God. Consequently, the things we experience on earth will never satisfy our hearts. We are longing for something much greater than this world will ever be able to offer. So let us seek to honor God by living for eternity in the every day.

Yearning with you,

Kayla